Game of Thrones, Season 4

Joffrey:
Well fought, well fought! Here you are champion's purse. You know, you're not really the champion yet, are you? A ture champion defeats all the challengers. Surely there are others who still dare to challenge my reign? Uncle? How about you? I'm sure they have a spare costume.

[Tyrion smiles and stands up.]

Tyrion:
One taste of combat was enough for me, Your Grace. I would like to keep what remains of my face. I think you should fight. This was but a poor imitation of your own bravery on the field of battle. I speak as a firsthand witness. Climb down from the high table with your new Valyrian sword and show everyone how a true king wins his throne. Be careful though. [Nods towards the champion dwarf.] This one is clearly mad with lust. It would be a tragedy for the king to lose his virtue hours before his wedding night.

[[Enraged and humiliated, Joffrey walks over to Tyrion and empties his goblet over his uncle's head.]

Tyrion:
Fine vintage. A shame that it spilled.

Joffrey:
It did not spill.

Margaery Tyrell:
My love, come back to me. It's time for my father's toast.

Joffrey:
[He does so] Well, how does he expect me to toast without wine? [To Tyrion] Uncle, you can be my cupbearer, seeing as you're too cowardly to fight.

Tyrion:
Your Grace does me a fine honor.

Joffrey:
[Dryly] It's not meant as an honor.

[A brief pause, and Tyrion gets up to take the cup, but Joffrey drops it. As Tyrion bends to pick it up, Joffrey kicks it underneath a table. Everyone stares with disbelief]

Joffrey:
Bring me my goblet.

[Tyrion goes underneath the table searching for the goblet. Sansa picks it up and hands it to Tyrion, who, in turn, hands it to Joffrey]

Joffrey:
What good is an empty cup? Fill it. [Tyrion fills the cup with wine and hands it to Joffrey] Kneel. [Tyrion looks at him] Kneel before your king. [Pause] Kneel. [Pause as Tyrion glares at Joffrey; Getting angry] I said... KNEEL!! [Tyrion keeps glaring at him]

Margaery Tyrell:
Oh, look, the pie!