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How I Met Your Mother, Season 5

How I Met Your Mother (2005-2014) is an American sitcom, which aired Mondays at 8:00 pm on CBS. The series is narrated through flashbacks from the future, in which an older version of the main character, Ted Mosby, tells his two children the story o… more »

[A certain videotape from Barney's porn collection has somehow ended up in Ted's VHS player]

Woman's Voiceover:
ArchiSexture, the world of - [screen cuts into Barney]

Barney:
Hello Ted. If you're watching this tape - and I knew you'd pick this one - you are now in possession of my porn. This can only mean two things - either I'm dead, or I'm now in a committed relationship. If I'm dead, I want you to honor my memory by taking my body to the Hamptons and recreating Weekend at Bernie's. I wanna dance, I wanna have sex with a girl, and I wanna go fishing. If, on the other hand, I'm in a committed relationship, then as your best friend, I have only one request: Please for the love of God, GET ME OUT OF IT!

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