Little Britain, Series One

Marjorie Dawes:
So what advice can we give to Barbara, to turn her tragic life around? Paul.

Paul:
[sighs] Cut out biscuits.

Marjorie Dawes:
Cut out biscuits. Good. Anyone else? Mary?

Meera:
Instead of sugar, use artificial sweetener in tea.

Marjorie Dawes:
Something about sugar. But really I think the most useful advice we can all give you is to look at the person inside. Because you're obviously an incredibly unhappy person.

Barbara:
No, I'm not!

Marjorie Dawes:
Well you deserve to be! I know Mum doesn't speak to you anymore, but that's not for here. But as far as she's concerned if you got knocked down by a bus tomorrow the world would be a better place!

Barbara:
Mum does speak to me! I spoke to her yesterday!