Lost, Season Three

Cooper:
Guess I didn't raise no dummies.

Sawyer:
The hell's that mean?

Cooper:
It means that bald headed bastard outside the door is my son.

Sawyer:
Come again?

Cooper:
My son. As in I'm his father. You do speak English?

Sawyer:
How did you get here, to the Island?

Cooper:
Island? OK. I'm driving down I10 through Tallahassee when bam, somebody slams into the back of my car. I go right into the divider at seventy miles an hour, the next thing I know, the paramedics are strapping me to a gurney, stuffing me into the back of an ambulance and one of them actually smiles at me as he pops the IV in my arm. And then, nothing. Just, black. And the next thing I know I wake up in a dark room tied up, gag in my mouth, and when the door opens, I'm looking up at the same man I threw out a window, John Locke. My dead son.

Sawyer:
And he's dead cause you threw him out a window?

Cooper:
No he survived that. But it paralysed him, permanently. He's dead because the plane he was flying on crashed in the Pacific.

Sawyer:
Well I got bad news for ya pops, cause I was on that plane with your son. He sure as hell wasn't crippled. And we didn't crash in the Pacific, we crashed here on this Island.

Cooper:
You sure its an Island?

Sawyer:
Well what else is it?

Cooper:
Little hot for heaven isn't it?

Sawyer:
[Sarcastically] Oh OK, so we're dead?

Cooper:
They found your plane on the bottom of the ocean. One minute I'm in a car wreck and the next minute I'm in a pirate ship in the middle of the jungle. If this isn't hell friend, then where are we?

Sawyer:
Why did you throw Locke out a window?

Cooper:
He was becoming a nuisance. I conned him into giving me one of his kidneys. He never got over it.

Sawyer:
[Pauses] Conned?

Cooper:
Yes sir, conned.

Sawyer:
What's your name?

Cooper:
Hmm?

Sawyer:
Your name.

Cooper:
A conman goes by many names friend. I've been Alan Seward, Anthony Cooper, Ted MacLaren, Tom Sawyer, Louis Jackson, and Paul...

Sawyer:
Tom Sawyer.

Cooper:
I was young and Huck Finn was taken. And the ladies loved that one. Made me charming.

Sawyer:
Well how about that.

Cooper:
How about what?

Sawyer:
Sawyer's my name too

Cooper:
What's the matter with you?

Sawyer:
You ever been to Jasper, Alabama?

Cooper:
Why?

Sawyer:
Have you or haven't you?

Cooper:
Yeah I been to Jasper. Don't tell me I'm your daddy?

Sawyer:
No. You killed my daddy.

[Sawyer gets his letter out of his pocket - the one to Mr. Sawyer]

Sawyer:
Read it.

Cooper:
"Dear Mr Sawyer". What is this?

Sawyer:
Just read it.

Cooper:
"You don't know who I am, but I know who you are. And I know what you done. You had sex with my mother, and then you stole my dad's money all away, so he got angry and he killed my mother, and then he killed himself" blah blah blah blah. So what? Is this supposed to be you, you wrote this letter? Hey wait a second. Did you take my name because you were on some kind of revenge kick?

Sawyer:
Keep reading.

Cooper:
Easy, easy, don't get all worked up. Look, I ran that con two dozen times. If your mother was one of the...

Sawyer:
Mary. Her name was Mary.

Cooper:
Mary from Jasper, Alabama. Yeah, I remember her. She practically begged me to take her thirty-eight thousand dollars and to rescue her from her sorry little life.

Sawyer:
You finish the letter.

Cooper:
Look, I only took her money. It ain't my fault your dad overreacted. If he pulled the old murder suicide then I'm sure he's down here somewhere. Er, maybe you could take this up with him...

Sawyer:
FINISH IT!!!

Cooper:
OK. OK.

[He rips up the letter into pieces, and Sawyer attacks him, choking him with the chains hanging from the ceiling]

Sawyer:
You wanna go to hell? You wanna go to hell!!

[Cooper chokes and Sawyer keeps pulling until he stops moving and kills him. He then releases him and his body falls to the ground.]