Metalocalypse, Season 1

Pickles:
[enters restroom] I AM GONNA LOSE MY MIND! MY PARENTS JUST BRAG AND BRAG ABOUT MY BROTHER! [mocking high-pitched voice] "Oh, he's in a room above the garage!" [normal voice] BIG DEAL, HE'S AN EX-CON! [breathes from an inhaler, pants for breath] I haven't used one of these things in like 15 years.

Nathan:
[enters restroom, slamming the door open] WHAT THE FUCK?!

Skwisgaar:
This whole thing gives me a case of my stomachs throw-up!

William:
Don't worry about it, your mom seems cool!

Skwisgaar:
She was the most prosqueeminous women in Swedens, haves sex with everybody! Pffft! Thanks mom!

Nathan:
The fact that my parents had sex in order to create me makes me want to be buried alive.

William:
My grandma has an odor that's so very wrong and she wants me to buy that bastard a wheel chair. SHE WON'T SHUT UP ABOUT IT!

Pickles:
Why do we make it so hard on ourselves? We'll just solve it like any other problem!

William:
Of course! We have them put to sleep!

Pickles:
No, we'll lie! We'll lie through our teeth and throw money at them! We'll buy that bastard a wheel chair, take them to miniature golf or whatever the f*** people do. We'll pretend we're interested in what they're askin', and when that weekend's over, we'll ship them outta here, never to be seen again. Deal?

William:
Okay.