Monk, Season 1

[Late at night, Stottlemeyer and Disher brainstorm on how the immobile Biederbeck could have killed the judge.]

Lt. Disher:
What time is it?

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
[checks his watch] No, don't ask. [Randy looks at his watch and both policemen sigh.] Whew.

Lt. Disher:
Oh- [sniffs] Okay. Okay. Okay. Maybe we're looking at this all wrong. Maybe he killed her in his apartment, and then he somehow moved the body back to her house.

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
No. What about the 911 call? She made it from the house.

Lt. Disher:
What about liposuction?

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
What?

Lt. Disher:
Liposuction, yeah! He... he lipo'd himself down to like, uh... I don't know, like 400 pounds. Down the elevator, across town... killed the judge.

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
Well, how did he gain all the weight back?

[Long pause]

Lt. Disher:
Reverse liposuction.

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
Oh, my God.

Lt. Disher:
Yeah, he just pumped it all back in.

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
You think that's possible?

Lt. Disher:
I don't know. Should I call a doctor?

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
No. [chuckles] Let's keep our reverse liposuction theory to ourselves. Okay, Randy?