Monk, Season 1

[Monk and the other patients are painting their self-portraits]

Dr. Morris Lancaster:
Now remember, this is supposed to be a self portrait. How do you feel about yourself? Look deep inside. There's no right or wrong. [looks over one patient's work] Very good. I love those eyes.

Monk:
Excuse me, Doctor. Is there a sink nearby?

[Jane Gordon sighs]

Monk:
I-I-I need to wash up.

Jane Gordon:
Will you shut him up! He has been whining since he walked in here. It's too hot. It's too cold. I have charcoal on my hands!

Dr. Morris Lancaster:
Jane, what did we talk about yesterday?

Jane Gordon:
[takes a breath] Controlling the urge to lash out.

Dr. Morris Lancaster:
Do you have something you wanna say to Mr. Monk?

Jane Gordon:
[sighs] Sorry.

Monk:
That's okay. I do have a little charcoal on my hands.

Manny:
Dr. Lancaster, guess what I'm painting!

Everyone:
Santa Claus!

Dr. Morris Lancaster:
All right, all right. [He looks at Manny's work] Huh. Well, you know this is supposed to be a self-portrait. [We see that Manny has painted a HUGE Santa Claus, with a tiny boy at his feet]

Manny:
[points to the little boy] That's me.

Dr. Morris Lancaster:
Hmm. Why are you so small?

Manny:
Everybody's small compared to Santa. [Janie turns to Monk]

Jane Gordon:
He actually sits up every night and waits for him.

Manny:
I have a feeling he's on his way. It's definitely getting colder outside.

Jane Gordon:
It's August, whackjob!

Dr. Morris Lancaster:
It's all right. Back to work. Come on. Come on. Go ahead. Go ahead.