Monk, Season 2

[Agent Grooms kicks Stottlemeyer out of the interrogation room]

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
I just got kicked out of my own interrogation room.

Lt. Disher:
You want some coffee, sir?

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
No, Randy. What I want is for that A.T.F. creep to eat crow!

Monk:
Well, we know who did it, and we know why. We just don't know how.

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
Monk, again, he's in a coma.

Monk:
He's the guy.

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
In twenty seconds, Agent Grooms is gonna come walking through that door, and he's gonna ask me what I think. Give me something else, for the love of God.

Lt. Disher:
Okay, wait. I have an idea. Maybe he had an accomplice.

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
Yes, somebody else mailed the damn thing. Why not?

Sharona:
I already had that idea. Tell him.

Monk:
There was no accomplice. Why would Brian Babbage hire one? He didn't know he was gonna be in a coma.

Sharona:
It's not exactly something you can plan.

Monk:
All right. Anyway, why would an accomplice bother to go through with it? There was no reason to. The guy who hired him was in a coma.

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
All right, so... Brian built the bomb, and then Brian mailed the bomb, by himself.

Monk:
That's right.

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
While he was in a coma.

Monk:
[admiringly] You gotta admit - it's a pretty good alibi. It's rock solid!

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
Monk, I have known 15,000 criminals in my lifetime. Here's what they all have in common: they're conscious!

Monk:
Nonetheless.

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
Is your shrink coming back soon?