Monk, Season 7

[Stottlemeyer and Disher interrogate John Kuramoto's cousin about his whereabouts]

Lt. Disher:
You don't know where he is? Well, you're staying at his house, Vince.

Vince Kuramoto:
Hey, man. I'm just crashing at his place for a few days. He's my cousin. Do you know where all your cousins are?

Lt. Disher:
Where do you think he is, Vince?

Vince Kuramoto:
[loudly and clearly into the microphone, emphasizing every word] I. Don't. Know. [hits the tape recorder's microphone with his hand. Stottlemeyer casually puts it back upright]

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
Ah. Tough guy, ehh? [produces an evidence bag containing the recovered bullet] Look at this. See that? That's a bullet! That's a bullet that got dug out of our very dear friend's leg tonight!

Lt. Disher:
That makes your cousin a former cop shooter.

Vince Kuramoto:
Former what?

Lt. Disher:
Former cop shooter.

Vince Kuramoto:
You mean he used to shoot cops?

Lt. Disher:
No. He shot someone who used to be a cop.

Vince Kuramoto:
Why didn't you say that?

Lt. Disher:
I did, it's the same thing.

Vince Kuramoto:
It's not the same thing at all, it's not even close-

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
Oh for God's sakes!! What are you two, married or what?! Look, it's not complicated, Vince! If you know where your cousin is and you're not telling us, [points an accusing finger at Vince] that makes you an accessory after the fact.

Lt. Disher:
For aiding and abetting!

Capt. Stottlemeyer:
For attempted murder, which is a very very VERY long "goodbye"!! Let me put it this way: your parole officer? He hasn't been born yet.