Mystery Science Theater 3000, Season 10

Hamlet:
To be or not to be...

Mike:
The literary equivalent of "Da-da-da-dunnn!"

Hamlet:
That is the question.

Crow:
I'll take "to be" for 50, Alex.

Hamlet:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune...

Servo:
Starring Shelly Long and Bette Midler!

Hamlet:
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing end them?

Mike:
Ow, my shin's right on the edge of a stair.

Hamlet:
To die: to sleep.

Crow:
Yeah, that's what we're doing right now, Bub.

Hamlet:
No more; and by a sleep to say we end the heart-ache and the tousand natural shocks that flesh is heir to...

Mike:
Ok, we need a predicate, now.

Hamlet:
...'tis a consummation devoutly to be wish'd.

Crow:
Especially with Ophelia, man! [snickers]

Mike:
Oh, you...

Hamlet:
To die, to sleep.

Servo:
To SLEEP!

Mike:
Whoa, that's an old chesnut.

Hamlet:
To sleep...

Servo:
To SLEEEEEP

Hamlet:
Perchance to DREAM?

Servo:
The impossible DREAM?

Hamlet:
Aye, there's the rub.

Mike:
I knew I had some rub left...

. . .

Hamlet:
...When he himself might his quietus make with a bare bodkin?

Crow:
Heh, he said "bare bodkin," hehe.

Hamlet:
Who would fardels bear...

Mike':
Ha, fardels...

. . .

Hamlet:
And makes us rather bear those ills we have than fly to others--

Servo:
SUM UP!

Hamlet:
--that we know not of?

. . .

Mike:
So I'm a chicken for not stabbing myself--that's all you needed to say!