NCIS, Season 2

Tony:
Did you go Sake Bombing last night?

Kate:
It's a cold! Ugh! Sake Bombing?

Tony:
Come on Kate. Don't tell me you've never heard of Sake Bombing!

Kate:
Would I ask if I...(thinks for a minute) Forget it. I don't want to know!

Tony:
You take a cup of hot Sake,drop it in a beer,you toss it back and (makes explosion sound)

Kate:
(sarcastically) Sake Bombing!

Tony:
Great for a cold!

Kate:
I'll stick to honey and hot tea thanks!

Tony:
McGee. Kate's never heard of Sake Bombing!

McGee:
Yeah, I don't think I have either!

Tony:
I work with a pair of wankers!

Gibbs:
And you make three, DiNozzo!

Tony:
And a very good morning to you boss!

Kate:
(bunged up) Morning!

Gibbs:
Cold or flu?

Kate:
Just plain cold but don't worry. I promise to sneeze into my tissues! (to Tony) Unlike some people!

Tony:
I have allergies, Kate!

Gibbs:
Never had allergies. Never had a cold.

Kate:
Never had a cold?

Gibbs:
Nope! Never had the flu either.

Kate:
Why do I believe that?

Tony:
(Sotto voice) If you were a bug, would you attack Gibbs? (Kate smirks at his voice)

McGee:
I get colds all the time!

Tony:
Sure you do, Probie!

McGee:
(hold up a letter) This one is only adressed to Special Agent, NCIS.

Tony:
(sees the lipstick mark on the envelope) I think that's mine!

McGee:
(holds it out of Tony's reach) Huh? (sarcastically) How do you know?

Tony:
(snatches it back) I recognise the lips and the scent!

Kate:
(sarcastically) Gummy bears? (a white powder flies into Tony's face)

Gibbs:
(whistles to get everyones attention) There has been a letter opened with a white powder. Use the back entrance, you all know the drill!

Kate:
(calls to Tony) Tony! (throws a bottle of water at him then calls security) Letter opened in Special Agent Gibbs's Office, dispersed a fine, white powder. Level Two evacuating!

Gibbs:
McGee. You up on procedures?

McGee:
Yeah. We shower, burn our clothes, get our blood tested, no one leaves the building unless...

Tony:
Lucky me! I've won a free trip to Bethesda to be pricked like a pin cushion!

Kate:
(hears a clunking noise) They've shut down the air. (panicked for his sake) Lets hit the showers, Tony!

Tony:
I thought you'd never ask! Sorry boss!

[In the showers.]

Tony:
Who would send me a letter with anthrax?

Kate:
Pick a girl, Tony. Any girl.

Tony:
That's not funny, Kate.

Kate:
Yeah, I know.

Tony:
This is serious.

Kate:
I know, Tony! I'm sorry.

Tony:
At this very instant, someone is incinerating my Ermenegildo Zegna suit, my Armani tie, my Dolce Gabbana shirt and my Gucci shoes!

McGee:
You know, it might not be anthrax.

Tony:
I like the sound of that, Probie!

McGee:
It could be smallpox, bubonic plague, cholera...

Tony:
Probie!

McGee:
...foot powder, face powder, talcum powder...

Tony:
Honeydust!

McGee:
"Honeydust"?

Tony:
Honeydust. I give it to girls.

[Kate glares at him but she knows Tony can't see it. He knows it.]

Tony:
Women! Sorry, Kate. I give it to "women" at Christmastime. Very sensuous. You apply it with a feather.

Kate:
[chuckles] You don't use the whole chicken?

McGee:
I never heard of honeydust.

Kate:
Yeah, that's because your mother raised you to respect women, McGee.

Gibbs:
It makes a woman's skin feel silky smooth. When kissed, it tastes like honey.

[Everybody pokes their heads out of their showers and look in horror/amazement at Gibbs']

Gibbs:
Got a box of Honeydust last Christmas. No card.

Tony:
Ah... I think the post office screwed up, boss. Somebody else got your bottle of Jack and you got their...

[Tony is cut off by Kate]

Kate:
Hey! Doesn't the post office irradiate our mail?

McGee:
Yeah, that's right! All federal mail is funneled through the Ion Beam facility at Bridgeport, New Jersey. If it has DNA, it dies.

Tony:
The diseases that you name, they-they have DNA?

McGee:
They do.

Kate:
Oh, you should have let him squirm.

Tony:
Ha ha! Then, it's no worries!

Gibbs:
(meaning he knew it was Tony who sent him the present) Unless the post office screwed up again.