One Foot In The Grave, Series 4 (1993)

Patrick:
I would ring up and cancel, but I suppose it's be a bit inconsiderate, isn't it, really? Dragging him out of his coffin in broad daylight. I wonder what bizarre aquatic species I can expect in the groin this time. Stingray up the rectum? Perhaps I'll just get off lightly with a couple of barnacles on the foreskin.

Pippa:
Can you see an old dirty floorcloth by the door?

Patrick:
Uhm...yup.

Pippa:
Well, would you mind SHOVING IT in your bloody mouth?!