Saturday Night Live, Season 2

Peter:
[on the phone] Hello? Hello?

Jimmy Carter:
Yes. Hello, Peter?

Peter:
[on the phone] Is this the President?

Jimmy Carter:
Yes, it is.

Walter Cronkite:
Do you have a question for the President?

Peter:
[on the phone] Uh.. I uh.. I took some acid.. I'm afraid to leave my apartment, and I can't wear any clothes.. and the ceiling is dripping, and uh..

Walter Cronkite:
Well, thanks you very much for calling, sir..

Jimmy Carter:
Just a minute, Walter, this guy's in trouble. I think I better try to talk him down. Peter?

Peter:
[on the phone] Yeah..?

Jimmy Carter:
Peter, what did the acid look like?

Peter:
[on the phone] They were these little orange pills.

Jimmy Carter:
Were they barrel shaped?

Peter:
[on the phone] Uh.. yes.

Jimmy Carter:
Okay, right, you did some orange sunshine, Peter.

Peter:
[on the phone] Very good of you to know that, sir.

Jimmy Carter:
How long ago did you take it, Peter.

Peter:
[on the phone] Uh.. I don't know. I can't read my watch.

Jimmy Carter:
Alright, Peter, just listen. Everything is going to be fine. You're very high right now. You will probably be that way for five more hours. Try taking some Vitamin B complex, Vitamin C complex.. if you have beer, go ahead and drink it.

Peter:
[on the phone] Okay..

Jimmy Carter:
Just remember you're a living organism on this planet, and you're very safe. You've just taken a heavy drug. Relax, stay inside, and listen to some music. Do you have any Allman Brothers?

Peter:
[on the phone] Yes, I do, sir. Everything is okay, huh Jimmy?

Jimmy Carter:
It sure is, Peter. You know, I'm against drug use myself, but I'm not going to lay that on you right now. Just mellow out the best you can, okay?

Peter:
[on the phone] Okay.

Jimmy Carter:
Okay!