Blackadder

Blackadder:
Right. Now all we have to do is fill in this MP application form. "Name"...Baldrick. First name?

Baldrick:
Er... I'm not sure.

Blackadder:
Well, you must have some idea.

Baldrick:
Well, it might be Sod-Off.

Blackadder:
What?

Baldrick:
Well, when I was little and I used to play in the gutter, I used to say to the other snipes "Hello, my name's Baldrick." And they'd say "Yes, we know: Sod-Off Baldrick."

Blackadder:
All right, "Mr S. Baldrick." Now then, "Distinguishing features".... None.

Baldrick:
Hold on. I've got this big growth in the middle of my face.

Blackadder:
That's your nose, Baldrick. Now, "Any history of insanity in the family?"... Tell you what. I'll cross out the "in." "Any history of sanity in the family?" ... None whatsoever. Now, "Criminal record?"

Baldrick:
Absolutely not.

Blackadder:
Oh, come on, Baldrick, you're going to be an MP, for God's sake! Look, I'll just put "Fraud and sexual deviancy".