Blackadder

Blackadder:
Flashheart, this is Captain Darling.

Flashheart:
"Captain Darling"?! Funny name for a guy, isn't it? [jumps off table and faces Darling] Last person I called "Darling" was pregnant 20 seconds later! Hear you couldn't be bothered to help old Slackie here.

Darling:
[stuttering nervously] Oh, well, it... It wasn't quite like that, sir. It's just that we... weighed up the pros and cons and... decided it wasn't a reasonable use of our time and resources. [laughs nervously]

Flashheart:
Well, this isn't a reasonable use of my time and resources, but I'm gonna do it anyway.

Darling:
What?

Flashheart:
This! [headbutts Darling hard, knocking him unconscious] Alright Slackie, alright Slackie, I've gotta fly; two million chicks and only one Flashheart! And always remember, if you want something, take it! BOBBY!

[Bob walks in]

Bob:
My lord?

Flashheart:
I want something!

Bob:
[unbuttoning her coat] Take it!

Flashheart:
WOOF!

Blackadder:
[under his breath] Git.

[As Flashheart exits Melchett enters the room]

Melchett:
Ah, Blackadder! So you escaped?

Blackadder:
Yes sir.

Melchett:
Bravo! [briefly glances at the unconscious Darling] Don't slouch, Darling.

Blackadder:
I wonder whether, having been tortured by the most vicious sadist in the German army, I might have a week's leave to recuperate.

Melchett:
Splendid idea! Your commanding officer would have to be stark raving mad to refuse you!

Blackadder:
Well, you are my commanding officer.

Melchett:
Well?

Blackadder:
Can I have a week's leave to recuperate, sir?

Melchett:
[outraged] Certainly not!

Blackadder:
Thank you, sir.

Melchett:
BAAA!