CSI: Miami, Season 8

Calleigh:
You might forget, but the evidence always remembers.

Horatio:
Natalia, nothing is impossible.

Nevins:
Okay, but the cloud around it drove him here to Miami, and so here we are again with Cardoza's dirty evidence. My advice, Horatio: Fire him.

Horatio:
Out of the question.

Nevins:
Suit yourself. But not only will I reject this evidence, I will reject all evidence that Cardoza has anything to do with. He is compromising your lab.

Horatio:
Well, then I have no choice but to clear his name.

Horatio:
You're a pornographer, Mr. Enright.

Enright:
It's adult entertainment. It's a multibillion-dollar business. A very legitimate movie business.

Horatio:
Well, then, roll credits, Mr. Enright.

Enright':
I'm sorry?

Horatio:
That's a wrap.

Ryan:
That's your story? You're gonna stick with that?

Coop:
Not only am I gonna stick with it, but it's the truth, pint-size.

Ryan:
I'm 5-9.

Coop:
(laughs) My pants are 5-9.

Dave:
You can change all you want. You can't escape your past.

Calleigh:
You pulled the alarm.

Valerie:
Uh, well, yeah. I thought I smelled smoke.

Walter:
I think I smell a lie.

Eric:
Babe, work will still be here tomorrow. Should be back at the hospital.

Calleigh:
Yeah, you know...you've had this job before. You know sometimes there are just things you need to do. (about the dead boy) It's the strangest thing, but I feel like I knew him. (to the boy) Rest in peace.

Calleigh:
Okay, Ryan, look, I am sorry. I know that I should have waited for the fire department. It was a really stupid thing to do.

Ryan:
Calleigh, Calleigh, Calleigh, you always got to be a hero.

Ryan:
Somebody stole the stolen diamonds.

Walter:
This shouldn't be turned on.

Horatio:
How do you mean?

Walter:
I disconnected the battery before I processed it, and I left it that way.

Rick:
Battery's still connected.

Walter:
Yeah, I got eyes, pal.

Horatio:
[seeing their victim at the crime scene] Dr. Loman. I think we can safely say "overkill".

Tom:
Absolutely brutal. She was struck at least nine times, with so much force and velocity that each blow on its own could have been fatal.

Horatio:
What about a murder weapon?

Tom:
Not sure yet. But judging from her injuries and the varying direction of the blood spatter, whoever did this was swinging wildly, from several different directions and angles.

Horatio:
And totally out of control.

Tom:
And fueled by rage.

Horatio:
Yes. Someone... was very, very angry. Thank you, doctor.

Craig:
I'm a divorce lawyer. I make people angry for a living.

Eric:
H, I heard about the shooting.

Horatio:
Yes, they used an automated rifle, no prints, no trace, not registered.

Eric:
Sounds personal.

Horatio:
Yes. We received a message before the shooting.

Eric:
A message? What, like though the mail?

Horatio:
They slipped it into the morning mail. Exactly.

Eric:
Why would they target us?

Horatio:
I think I just heard an "us" in there.

Eric:
Yeah, that's right. While I was gone, I realized this is where I want to be.

Horatio:
Then I have you full-time.

Eric:
I'm back, if you'll have me.

Horatio:
That's good news. First order of business.

Eric:
[taking what Horatio offers him] These checks are from Dade University.

Horatio:
Let's figure out who this soccer mom really works for, okay? Good to have you back.

Delko:
Detective Caine, I thought you were going to invest in a pair of sunglasses.

Horatio:
I thought you were going to find them for me, Eric.

Darren:
My clerk tells me you want to cash a check for $100,000?

Ryan:
Actually we want to give you an "I Owe You."

Darren:
Funny. Get out of here or I'm gonna call the cops.

Calleigh:
We are the cops!

Tripp:
You own Royal Vista Check cashing, Mr Ripley?

Darren:
Uh, you know what, here a better question. When are you paying back the 100 grand you took from me?

Tripp:
Pay you back, what the hell are you talking about? That money's not worth the lint in my pocket!

Darren:
What my esteemed colleague is trying to say is that we know you're counterfeiting money.

Dean:
Look, I don't mean to be rude, but we're not insured for accidents like this.

Horatio:
See, the problem is we're not certain this is an accident. And we don't know what killed these boys.

Dean:
Yeah, well either way I just wanted to make sure my wife and I are not liable.

Horatio:
I understand. I'm actually focused on the young men who lost their lives.

Calleigh:
Well, the interviews are today, so hopefully the nightmare will be over in and Eric can come back to work.

Ryan:
Or you could both lose your jobs.

Calleigh:
That's not very positive.

Ryan:
So you get to fish out Burgess out of the toilet. Have fun with all that.

Jesse:
You know, why don't you go for it?

Ryan:
Well, I'm sorry first come first slime, my friend.

Jesse:
Well, why don't we play for it?

Ryan:
Rock, paper, scissors, are you serious?

Jesse:
It's the L.A. way. Why you scared?

Ryan:
Hell no, it's just I'm not eight years old that's all.

Walter:
Okay boys, how are we going to pull this one off? We don't have the authority and I don't feel a warrant in my pocket.

Ryan:
Walter, we have badges. These rural guys barely have educations.

Tripp:
Why were you running, super-fly?

Al:
Because you were chasing me.

Tripp:
Well, we got a paradox because I didn't start chasing until you started running.

Tom:
Meet Mr. Tito Estevev of Always Protected Security.

Ryan:
That company might want to think about getting a new name, don't you?

Tom:
Funny.

Jimmy:
Oh, hey, you are one smokin' lady. I could get you a magazine cover like that.

Natalia:
Awesome. Can you get this dirtbag out of here and I'll bag everything up?

Ryan:
What have you got?

Walter:
Possible skull fragment.

Ryan:
Walter, this is a turtle shell.

Walter:
A turtle shell?

Ryan:
Yeah, this is a turtle shell. Those are your shoes, that's the sky.

[Ryan and Walter see a bear close to them and it roars at them.]

Ryan:
Just make yourself small and nonthreatening.

Walter:
I can't be small and nonthreatening! I'm running for it!

Ryan:
Don't, you can't outrun a bear!

Walter:
I don't have to outrun the bear, I just have to outrun you.

[The bear charges at Ryan and Walter causing them both to scream. Jesse shoots the bear.]

Jesse:
It's okay, hey, hey, you're safe now girls.

Walter:
Man, that's insane! I mean the guy was standing right over there! Looked fine to me.

Ryan:
I bet he thought he dodged a bullet. Anyway, Walter last time I checked you can't charge a dead man with vehicular manslaughter.

Natalia:
A few black sequins missing. Can we keep this for our investigation?

Suspect:
Really?

Natalia:
Yeah, you'll get it back. I'll give you a receipt.

Suspect:
I better not see a picture of you wearing it in Ocean Drive.

Natalia:
Thank you. [To Jesse] Wow, don't come between a girl and her dress.

Ryan:
Well doctor, I don't have any sort of fancy medical degree, but I'd venture to guess that this victim died due to a head injury.

Tom:
Incorrect.

Calleigh:
Alright, look lady! If you do not get into that car without further incident, then I am happy to add resisting arrest to your rap sheet!

Miss Olsen:
Remember, I pay your salary.

Calleigh:
Then I deserve a raise.

Tripp:
Zack Finley is not our guy. In fact I don't even know if he's a guy!

Jesse:
Oh, come on, didn't you pat him down at the crime scene?

Tripp:
Yeah, for a gun.

Walter:
Whoa, whoa, whoa, so you're saying...

Tripp:
Let me spell it out for you, the guy doesn't have the equipment.

Walter:
This dress is so tiny. She always looks so much bigger on stage.

Ryan:
Oh, yeah? Were you a Phoenicks fan?

Walter:
Weren't you?

Ryan:
No, Walter. I'm not an eleven year old girl.

Walter:
Whatever man, Phoenicks was on fire.

Ryan:
Literally.

Walter:
Hey, Travis, let me ask you something. What kind of messed up world we living in when a guy can't go for a stroll without getting cut in half?

Travis:
The same kind of world that keeps me employed, I suppose.

Walter:
Hey, did she get her hearing checked out yet?

Ryan:
I told her she's a liability until she...

Natalia:
I can hear you both clear as a bell.

Walter:
You heard that?

Natalia:
Well, yeah, I went to the doctor. I, uh, got this little hearing aid.

Walter:
Check it out!

Ryan:
She's like the Bionic Woman, now.

Horatio:
Frank, does Phillip Hale have a record?

Tripp:
No, he's clean, but I pulled up his social security number to find out where he works.

Horatio:
And what'd you get?

Tripp:
Well, when he's not running over old ladies, he's a a caddie at the Forty Palms country club.

Jody:
What?

Neal:
Nothing!

Jody:
No, go ahead, say it!

Neal:
I knew there'd be no traffic.

Jody:
Fine. Next time we'll leave when you want to.

Neal:
No, no, no! That's okay, this is fine. This is better actually, because we can stare at this tree for 45 minutes.

Walter:
Maybe our victim's an alien.

Ryan:
Nah, I feel like Tom would have mentioned the green blood by now.

Walter:
Unless Tom's an alien too. Covering up the truth. Would explain a lot about Tom.

Ryan:
[To Tom, who is up an elevator shaft trying to separate the victim from the elevator] Hey Tom! You still up there?

Tom:
No, Ryan, I'm on lunch break.

Horatio:
[Catching Kyle staring at a waitress.] Subtle.

Kyle:
Yeah, well, twelve month tour in Basra will do that to you, I guess. You know, I think she likes me.

Horatio:
I think it's the uniform.

Kyle:
Yeah, more like the man wearing it.

Calleigh:
What kind of a person does that? I mean just puts a girl out with the laundry.

Tripp:
Well, blame it on Spring break. Guys think it's just a vacation from common decency, they can do whatever the hell they want to do with no, no consequences.

Calleigh:
Well, I tell you what. There are gonna be consequences.

Walter:
He's lying, H. That story's got holes in it as big as the one in our vic's chest.

Ryan:
Doctor.

Tom:
Concentration of carbon monoxide in his blood was 70%. That makes the cause of death asphyxiation.

Ryan:
Or you could just say he died of smoke inhalation.

Tom:
You say potato...

Stetler:
20 years. I gave my life for this, and what do I got to show for it? I got high blood pressure, I got two ex-wives and I got a pension that ain't worth spit.

Horatio:
We all do, that's the nature of the sacrifice.