Grey's Anatomy, Season 1

Webber:
Each of you comes here today hopeful, wanting in on the game. A month ago, you were in med school being taught by doctors. Today, you are the doctors. The seven years you spend here as a surgical resident will be the best and worst of your life. You will be pushed to the breaking point. Look around you. Say hello to your competition. Eight of you will switch to an easier specialty. Five of you will crack under the pressure. Two of you will be asked to leave. This is your starting line. This is your arena. How well you play...That's up to you.

Bailey:
I have five rules. Memorize them. Rule number one: Don't bother sucking up. I already hate you. That's not gonna change. Trauma protocol, phone list, pagers. Nurses will page you, you answer every page at a run. A run! That's rule number two! Your first shift starts now and lasts 48 hours. You're interns, grunts, nobodies, bottom of the surgical food chain. You run labs, write orders, work every second night until you drop, and don't complain! On-call rooms. Attendings hog them. Sleep when you can where you can, which brings me to rule number three. If I'm sleeping, don't wake me unless your patient is actually dying. Rule number four: The dying patient better not be dead when I get there. Not only will you have killed someone, you would have woke me for no good reason. We clear?

[Meredith raises her hand]

Bailey:
Yes?

Meredith:
You said five rules. That was only four.

Bailey:
[glares and continues walking] Rule number five: when I move, you move.

Meredith:
Dr. Shepherd.

Derek:
Dr. Shepherd? This morning it was Derek, now it's Dr. Shepherd.

Meredith:
Dr. Shepherd, we should pretend it never happened.

Derek:
What never happened? You sleeping with me last night? Or you throwing me out this morning? Because both are very fond memories I'd like to hold on to.

Meredith:
No, there will be no memories. I'm not the girl in the bar anymore and you're not the guy. This can't exist. You get that, right?

Derek:
You took advantage of me and now you want to forget about it?

Meredith:
I did not take—

Derek:
I was drunk, vulnerable and good looking and you took advantage.

Meredith:
Okay, I was the one who was drunk and you are NOT that good looking.

Derek:
Maybe not today, but last night I was very good looking. I had on my red shirt, my good looking shirt and you took advantage.

Meredith:
I did not!

Derek:
Would you like to take advantage again, say Friday night?

Meredith:
No! You're an attending and I'm your intern! Stop looking at me like that.

Derek:
Like what?

Meredith:
Like you've seen me naked.

[Derek laughs]

Meredith:
I wish I wanted to be a chef, or a ski instructor, or a kindergarten teacher.

George:
You know, I would have been a really good postal worker. I'm dependable.

[Meredith chuckles]

George:
You know, my parents tell everyone they meet that their son's a surgeon. As if it's a big accomplishment. Superhero or something... If they could see me now.

Meredith:
When I told my mother I wanted to go to medical school, she tried to talk me out of it. Said I didn't have what it takes to be a surgeon, that I'd never make it. So the way I see it, superhero sounds pretty damn good.

Meredith:
[voiceover] I can't think of any one reason why I want to be a surgeon, but I can think of a thousand reasons why I should quit. They make it hard on purpose. There are lives in our hands. There comes a moment when it's more than just a game, and you either take that step forward or turn around and walk away. I could quit but here's the thing, I love the playing field.

Meredith:
[voiceover] It's all about lines. The finish line at the end of residency, waiting in line for a chance at the operating table, and then there's the most important line, the line separating you from the people you work with. It doesn't help to get too familiar, to make friends. You need boundaries, between you and the rest of the world. Other people are far too messy. It's all about lines. Drawing lines in the sand and praying like hell no one crosses them.

Bailey:
Every intern wants to perform their first surgery. That's not your job. Do you know what your job is? To make your resident happy. Do I look happy? No! Why? Because my interns are whiny. You know what will make me look happy? Having the code team staffed, having the trauma pages answered, having the weekend labs delivered and having someone down in the pit doing the sutures. No one holds a scalpel until I'm so happy I'm Mary Freakin' Poppins.

Meredith:
I kissed Derek.

Cristina:
You kissed Derek?

Meredith:
In the elevator.

Cristina:
Why'd you kiss him in the elevator?

Meredith:
I was having a bad day. I am having a bad day.

Cristina:
This is what you do on your bad days, make out with Dr. McDreamy.

Meredith:
Well, you know, that and carrying around a penis just makes everything seem so shiny and happy.

George:
Who here feels like they have no idea what they're doing?

[Everyone except Alex raises their hands]

Meredith:
[voiceover] At some point you have to make a decision. Boundaries don't keep other people out; they fence you in. Life is messy, that's how we're made. [...] So you can waste your life drawing lines or you can live your life crossing them. [...] But there are some lines [...] that are way too dangerous to cross. [...] Here's what I know, if you're willing to take the chance, the view from the other side is spectacular.

Meredith:
[voiceover] We live out our lives on the surgical unit. Seven Days a week, fourteen hours a day, we're together more than we are apart. After a while, the ways of residency becomes the ways of life. Number one : Always keep score. Number two: do whatever you can to outsmart the other guy. Number three: Don't make friends with the enemy. Oh, yeah, Number four: Everything, everything is a competition. Whoever said winning wasn't everything ... Never held a scalpel.

Burke:
[to Cristina and Meredith] This is the men's room. Either whip one out, or close the door.

Meredith:
They're everywhere. All the time. Izzie's all perky and George does this thing where he's helpful and considerate. They share food, and they say things, and they move things, and they breathe. Ugh, they're like, happy.

Cristina:
Kick them out.

Meredith:
I can't kick them out, they just moved in. I asked them to move in.

Cristina:
So what, you're just going to repress everything in some deep, dark, twisted place until one day you snap and kill them?

Meredith:
Yep.

Cristina:
This is why we are friends.

Cristina:
Oh, that kills you, doesn't it?

Alex:
What?

Cristina:
That two women got the harvest.

Alex:
No, it kills me that anybody got the harvest, but me. Boobs do not factor into this equation. Unless you want to show me yours.

Meredith:
I'm going to become a lesbian.

Cristina:
Me too.

Meredith:
[voiceover] There's another way to survive this competition. A way no one ever seems to tell you about. One you have to learn for yourself. Number five: It's not about the race at all. There are no winners or losers. Victories are counted by the number of lives saved. [...] And once in a while, if you're smart, the life you save could be your own.

Meredith:
[voiceover] Intimacy is a four syllable word for, 'Here is my heart and soul, please grind them into hamburger and enjoy.' It's both desired, and feared. Difficult to live with, and impossible to live without. Intimacy also comes attached to the three R's... relatives, romance, and roommates. There are some things you can't escape. And other things you just don't want to know.

George:
You don't understand! Me gonads, you ovaries.

Izzie:
Oh, that reminds me, we are out of tampons.

George:
No, you're parading through the bathroom in your underwear, when I'm naked in the shower!

Izzie:
You add it to your list, please?

George:
What?

Izzie:
Tampons!

Meredith:
To the list, it's your turn.

George:
I am a man! I don't buy girl products! I don't want you walking in while I'm in the shower. I don't want to see you in your underwear!

Izzie:
[to Alex] You wanna see it? You really want to see it? Fine! Let's look at that tattoo up close and personal, shall we? What are these? Oh, my God! Breasts! How does anybody practice medicine hauling these things around? And what have we got back here? Let's see if I remember my anatomy. Glutes, right? Let’s study them, shall we? Gather around and check out the booty that put Izzie Stevens through med school! Have you had enough, or should I continue, because I have a few more very interesting tattoos. You want to call me Dr. Model? That's fine. Just remember that while you're still sitting on two hundred grand of student loans... I'm out of debt.

Meredith:
[voiceover] I wish there were a rulebook for intimacy. Some kind of guide to tell you when you've crossed the line. It would be nice if you could see it coming, and I don't know how you fit it on a map. You take it where you can get it, and keep it as long as you can. And as for rules, maybe there are none. Maybe the rules of intimacy are something you have to define for yourself.

Meredith:
[voiceover] Remember when you were a kid and your biggest worry was, like, if you'd get a bike for your birthday or if you'd get to eat cookies for breakfast? Being an adult? Totally overrated. I mean, seriously, don't be fooled by all the hot shoes and the great sex and the no parents anywhere telling you what to do. Adulthood is responsibility.

George:
Who else did you invite?

Cristina:
Izzie, we said the list was jocks only. Surgery, Trauma, Plastics. Who else?

Izzie:
Just some people from Peds.

Cristina:
You invited the preschoolers to Meredith’s house? The next thing you’ll say is you invited the shrinks.

[Izzie looks away]

Cristina:
She invited mental defects. This party’s DOA.

Lawyer:
Dr. Grey made a huge error.

Burke:
And she reported it.

Lawyer:
Too late. And in front of the patient's husband.

Burke:
But she reported it. She spoke up. Five years ago, as a CT fellow, I had a nagging feeling that I didn't check the body cavity of a lung patient closely enough before I closed. The patient seemed fine post-op and I was in a hurry. And yesterday, you and Dr. Bailey pulled a towel out from under that patient's lung. Why didn't I report it at the appropriate time? Maybe because I was afraid that I would be called into a meeting where some hospital lawyer's fear of liability could end my career. Even great doctors make mistakes. And when we do, we've got to have a chance to be able to speak up without fear of retribution. Or everyone suffers. Dr. Grey spoke up.

Meredith:
[voiceover] Responsibility, it really does suck. Unfortunately, once you get past the age of braces and training bras, responsibility doesn't go away. It can't be avoided. Either someone makes us face it or we suffer the consequences. And still adulthood has it perks. I mean the shoes, the sex, the no parents anywhere telling you what to do. That's, pretty damn good.

Meredith:
[voiceover] A couple hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. "Never leave that till tomorrow," he said, "Which you can do today." This is the man who discovered electricity. You'd think more of us would listen to what he had to say. I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure. Fear of pain. Fear of rejection. [...] Sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo? Whatever it is we're afraid of, one thing holds true: that by the time the pain of not doing the thing gets worse than the fear of doing it, it can feel like we're carrying around a giant tumor. [pause] And you thought I was speaking metaphorically.

Derek:
Miranda.

Bailey:
Excuse me?

Derek:
Well, that's your name right? It's on your jacket. Fine, I'll just call you Bailey then.

Bailey:
You know, you think you're charming, in that talented, neurotic, overly moussed hair sort of way. Good for you. But if you think I'm gonna stand back and watch while you favor her...

Derek:
I don't favor her. She's good.

Bailey:
I'm sure she is.

Derek:
You know, can I point out, that technically, I'm your boss.

Bailey:
You don't scare me. Look, I'm not gonna advertise your extracurricular activities with my intern. However the next time I see you favoring Meredith Grey in any way, I'll make sure she doesn't see the inside of an OR for a month. Just for the sake of balance.

Izzie:
[to a patient after he throws up on Alex] You are so my favorite person today.

Meredith:
[voiceover] The early bird catches the worm; a stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we haven't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to 'seize the day'. Still sometimes we have to see for ourselves. [...] We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore, until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin meant. That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping. And that even the biggest failure, even the worst most intractable mistake beats the hell out of never trying.

Meredith:
[voiceover] OK. Anyone who says you can sleep when you die, tell them to come talk to me after a few months as an intern. Of course, it's not just the job that keeps us up all night. I mean, if life's so hard already, why do we bring more trouble down on ourselves? What's up with the need to hit the self-destruct button?

George:
You get any sleep?

Izzie:
She could oil the bedsprings, as a courtesy, or at least buy a padded headboard.

George:
So, who's the guy?

Izzie:
You think it was just one guy doing all that work?

George:
Do you mind if I don't think about that?

Izzie:
Aw, you jealous?

George:
Not jealous.

Izzie:
Well, I am. But at least I know she'll be having a long day at work.

[They see Derek sneak out of the house.]

Izzie:
Well, at least we know brain surgery isn't his only skill.

George:
Yang. I'm scrubbing in on a hemospherectomy with Shepherd.

Cristina:
[gasps] Get out! I would kill for that.

George:
We're cutting out half a girl's brain, and it's going to work. It's outrageous. Almost makes it hard to hate him.

Cristina:
Why do you hate him?

George:
Oh, no reason.

Cristina:
Oh, you know about him and Meredith?

George:
You know?

Cristina:
When are you gonna figure out that I know everything?

George:
[to Izzie who is walking up the stairs] She knows.

Izzie:
Oh, about doctorcest?

Cristina:
It's been going on for, like, ever.

Izzie:
Wha... seriously?

George:
And you didn't tell us?

Cristina:
Oh, you're a gossip, huh?

George:
I am not!

Izzie:
I am!

George:
He's about to go into major brain surgery on no sleep? Not very responsible.

Cristina:
Jealous much? Sex all night isn't about being responsible.

Izzie:
No, it's about sex all night. I can't believe you're not more pissed off about this, you of all people.

Cristina:
Well, she works hard all day. She's good at her job, why should you care how she unwinds? I mean you like to bake all night, some people like to drink, others like an occasional screaming orgasm.

Alex:
[Walking up] Yeah we do.

Derek:
Let me explain.

George:
It's fine!

Derek:
No, there is a code among doctors. We're not supposed to ask each other questions. Not within the walls of this hospital.

George:
OK, I was out of line.

Derek:
No, you weren't. I was. I was out of line. Somebody should have taken responsibility. And it should have been the guy doing the cutting. It should have been me. You didn't deserve what happened to you today. You did the right thing, code or no code.

Meredith:
[voiceover] Maybe we like the pain. Maybe we're wired that way. Because without it, I don't know, maybe we just wouldn't feel real. What's that saying? Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer? Because it feels so good when I stop.

Meredith:
[voiceover] You know how when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales? That fantasy of what your life would be – white dress, Prince Charming who'd carry you away to a castle on a hill. You'd lie in bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming – they were so close you could taste them. But eventually you grow up, one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is, it's hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely because almost everyone still has that smallest bit of hope and faith that one day they'll open their eyes and it will all come true.

Meredith:
It's just that I hardly know anything about you.

Derek:
You know I'm from New York. You know I like ferry boats.

Meredith:
Enough with the ferry boats. What about your friends?

Derek:
I'm a surgeon. I don't have friends.

Meredith:
Everybody has friends. I mean, who do you hang out with? What do you do on your days off? These are important questions.

Derek:
Ah, important for who?

Meredith:
We're having sex every night. I think I deserve details.

Derek:
You have more details than most.

Derek:
[after Meredith bombards him with questions] Lighten up. It'd be good for your blood pressure.

Meredith:
Oh, don't you tell me to lighten up. I'll lighten up when I....feel light.

Derek:
I'm going to cut here from the base of the neck to the rib cage. I want you to hit the bleeders.

Meredith:
I still don't think we should be doing this.

[Derek cuts into the patient's back.]

Derek:
This guy has a spinal hematoma.

Meredith:
We don't know that.

Derek:
Which left untreated are almost always fatal.

Meredith:
You're cutting blind. Whatever happened to being practical?

Derek:
I need to see more here. Retractor. [uses retractor to expose the spinal column]

Meredith:
Wow. The spine.

Derek:
There's no wow in "practical".

Meredith:
[voiceover] At the end of the day, faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And it's not so important, that it's happy ever after, just that it's happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you, and once in a while people may even take your breath away.

Meredith:
[voiceover] Secrets can't hide in science. Medicine has a way of exposing the lies. Within the walls of the hospital, the truth is stripped bare. How we keep our secrets outside the hospital – well, that’s a little different. One thing is certain, whatever it is we're trying to hide; we're never ready for that moment when the truth gets naked. That's the problem with secrets – like misery, they love company. They pile up and up until they take over everything, until you don't have room for anything else, until you're so full of secrets you feel like you're going to burst.

Izzie:
[After George comes out of the bathroom] There's no reason to be ashamed. It's normal, healthy even.

George:
I'm not ashamed. 'Cause I wasn't doing anything. I don't have to. I have a girlfriend.

Izzie:
An imaginary girlfriend?

George:
An actual girlfriend.

Izzie:
You know what? It's no big deal, you don't have to lie. I get it. You have needs.

Meredith:
What is going on out here?

George:
Nothing.

[George walks away]

Izzie:
[to Meredith] Nothing. He's freaked out because I caught him playing with little Jimmy and the twins.

George:
[he turns around] I have a girlfriend.

[then he walks away]

Izzie:
OK.

[Izzie laughs]

Cristina:
Hey Syph-boy!

George:
You told her?

Izzie:
Just Cristina.

Alex:
Syph-boy. It's got a nice ring to it; kind of like Super-boy, only diseased.

Meredith:
[voiceover] The thing people forget is how good it can feel when you finally set secrets free. Whether good or bad, at least they're out in the open, like it or not. And once your secrets are out in the open, you don't have to hide behind them anymore. The problem with secrets is even when you think you're in control, you're not.

Derek:
[he sees Addison] Meredith, I am so sorry. [Addison walks over] Addison. What are you doing here?

Addison:
Well you'd know if you'd bothered to return any one of my phone calls. [she turns to Meredith] Hi. I'm Addison Shepherd.

Meredith:
Shepherd?

Addison:
And you must be the woman who's been screwing my husband.