Knight Rider, Season 1

(On the bed, Michael is stirring restlessly, has flashbacks of being shot by Tanya, and Muntzy being shot, mumbles)

Wilton Knight:
That's alright, son. Keep hurting, it'll keep you living, just like me.

(Michael is jogging on the estate grounds, Wilton and Devon look on)

Devon:
What have you told him?

Wilton:
I've told him he no longer has anyone to fear. In the eyes of the law, Michael Long is legally dead and we haven't done anything wrong.

Devon:
Wilton, stealing a body from the medical school so that the police can find it is hardly what I would call playing by the rules.

Wilton:
I make my own rules. So does the government, they fake deaths and identities all the time. Not to mention our adversary.

Devon:
All right. But why are you doing it?

Wilton:
I think you know why, Devon. I want to leave something behind me. Something worthwhile, not just a lot of numbers in a bank account. Now, when will the Knight 2000 be ready?

Devon:
Soon. I have the crews working double shifts.

Wilton:
Make it around the clock. I want it done, I want it done within the next 48 hours.

Devon:
48 hours? Wilton, has the doctor said that...

Wilton:
Don't you worry about what the good doctor has told me. I'll worry about the doctors, and Michael Long.

(Michael and Devon arrive at Wilton's deathbed)

Wesley:
You better hurry.

(Michael and Devon enter the room)

Devon:
We're too late.

Wilton:
(Opens his eyes, smiles) Almost. What kept you? Car not fast enough?

Michael:
(Chuckles) Look, you gotta put that thing on the market, could save thousands of lives.

Wilton:
Have it taken away from me, kept off the market, like they did my airpl-- (coughs badly) airplane?

Devon:
Don't try to talk, I'll explain everything. (To Michael) Mr. Knight is the last of his breed. He built his own empire, just as the Fords and the Rockefellers did.

Michael:
Devon, we've been all through this.

(Wilton's last words)

Wilton:
All right. Michael, come closer. (Michael obeys) You were spared to lead a great fight. Don't turn away in fear. One man can make a difference, and you are going to be that man.

Michael:
Mr. Knight, I'd like to be able to promise you that I feel like I could take on the world someday, but I can't. I still wake up in the middle of the night shaking, (flashback to Tanya Walker shooting Michael), remembering that gun in my face and the whole world blowing up.

Wilton:
Remember that moment. Think of it as your baptism by fire. (Extends his hand, Michael takes it) My adventure has ended, yours has just... just begun.

(Last lines, Michael and Devon aboard the Knight Foundation's jet)

Michael:
Now then, about my car.

Devon:
Well, simply stated, Wilton Knight was my friend as well as my employer. And my legacy is to see that his final dream is faithfully pursued, like it or not. Your options are still open. You don't have to...

Michael:
Devon, the old man wanted me, it was his dying request.

Devon:
Yes, to rid the world of Tanya and her friends. But the rest of his dream will bore you to tears! The majority of our activity here involves legal research, class-action suits, strictly bureaucratic stuff.

Michael:
What else?

Devon:
What else?

Michael:
Yeah, the part he wanted me for?

Devon:
Well, Mr. Knight also believed that under certain circumstances, direct action might be the only feasible solution. That's what the Knight 2000 was designed for. The pilot program consists of one man and one car. Absurd really. I mean, who would want to take on such a thing?

Michael:
I was supposed to be that man, wasn't I?

Devon:
Well, he seemed to feel that you were singularly well-qualified to "go it alone", as he put it. But who could expect it of you? I mean, you barely came through this misadventure with your life. Not to mention the damage to the Knight 2000.

Michael:
I spent years of my life fighting criminals of one type or another who always had the upper hand and now this, it's a loner's dream. It's been handed to me on a silver platter: the world's most fantastic car, all the money and all the resources of the Knight Foundation, and most of all the best chance I'll ever get to prove that one man really can make a difference.

Devon:
(pours two glasses of whiskey, hands one to Michael) I was afraid that would be your attitude. Well, shall we drink to what may be the start of, um...

Michael:
Of what?

Devon:
One man's dream.

Michael:
And to our future. No matter who it may take us up against, or where. (They clink glasses)

Major:
You're gonna be in big trouble, Knight: accosting army personnel, destroying government property.

Michael:
Oh, really? Major, these shells are blue. According to that chart over there, they're armor-piercing shells. What if somebody repainted them? I know it's an awful thought, but just suppose. Well, then they might be... tactical nuclear weapons.

Michael:
You know, you and your buddies must have watched too many bad movies on TV when you were kids.

Hilly:
Why is that?

Michael:
'Cause your accidentally lousy manners are ten years out of date. You can't be real.

Hilly:
Oh I'm for real, I'm a Scorpion. Hilly.

[draws switchblade]

Sherry:
Davey, run. Go get the sheriff, quick!

Hilly:
This... is Stinger. You're about to be the stingee.

Michael:
Before or after the commercial?

Sheriff Bruckner:
I'll see if I can arrange some kind of a reward for you, Sherry, for aprehending the prisoner.

Sherry:
Oh come on, Sheriff, he is not a criminal.

Sheriff Bruckner:
Yeah, a few hours ago I might have believed you. Since then he has stolen his vehicle from the impound lot and broken out of jail.

Michael Knight:
I didn't steal my car.

Sheriff Bruckner:
Oh I suppose you want me to believe that it drove itself over here and picked you up?

Michael:
Devon, don't let anyone tell you differently: you are a little strange.

Maggie:
(after dodging explosions on road) I just hope the next time you go for a ride like this, you take me along. It's fun!

Michael:
Yeah, it's a real blast.

Maggie:
Outta sight.

Michael:
Bonnie, with those hands, you should've been a surgeon.

Bonnie:
That's what my dad always said. I had to practically slash my wrists to convince him I couldn't stand the sight of blood.

Michael:
Medicine's loss, our gain.

(after evading bulldozers trying to ram them)

KITT:
Are you positive it was a deliberate assault on us?

Michael:
No question about it.

KITT:
How can you be so sure?

Michael:
Because earthmovers don't mate this time of year.

Michael:
(promising to find fuel for KITT) I'll find you some blood, Dracula.

KITT:
A very inept analogy. Blood has almost no combustible qualities at all.

Devon:
KARR is like a loaded gun in the hands of a child; it's only a matter of time until there's a real explosion.

Michael:
What's wrong with a little companionship? You can understand that.

KITT:
No, I cannot. When you're one-of-a-kind, companionship does not compute.

KARR:
You waste your time, my twin. You cannot triumph over a prototype. Desist your pursuit. You will be damaged.

KITT:
KARR, I didn't know you cared. KARR, perhaps you should be a little more careful and a lot less belligerent.

Michael:
How's it feel being one of a kind again?

KITT:
Being one of a kind, is a very familiar feeling.

Michael:
Maybe I can get something from the girl.

KITT:
I wouldn't touch that line with a 10-foot drive shaft!

Michael:
I have a problem.

Devon:
My dear boy, don't be modest. You have a multitude of problems.

KITT:
With your usual lack of subtlety, you would have no problem at all in panicking anyone with anything at all to hide. Actually, we might go so far as...

Michael:
KITT?

KITT:
Yes, Michael, I know.

Michael:
Shut up.

Micki:
Michael, if you don't stop driving like this, I'm gonna jump out.

Michael:
Again?

Michael:
How many languages do you speak now, anyway?

KITT:
Should I count the archaic tongues?

KITT:
There's no doubt about it, Michael. That's the exact signal I detected 2 milliseconds before the Prince brothers were... what is the phrase?

Bonnie:
Blown to smithereens.

Liberty:
(muffled scream through tape)

KITT:
Michael, she would like you to take the gag off.

Michael:
Oh. (looks at Liberty) I don't think so. You know, this is the first conversation I've had with you where I could get a word in edgewise.

Lauren:
Okay, there's the smile. Let's see, what else do we have? Ah, the cake, champagne... anything else?

Michael:
I'll tell ya what; you do the cake, I'll do the champagne, and then we'll see what else comes to mind.

Sheriff Moore:
That dishrag you put out you're calling "the press?"

Jobina:
Just as surely as you call those six high school dropouts a police force.

Deauville:
Does it surprise you that we have devised the perfect crime to finance our project?

Michael:
Comin' from you, nothin' surprises me.

Deauville:
Good. We understand each other.

(Michael arrives to confront Deauville)

Deauville:
Kill Michael Knight, KITT. Kill him!

(KITT starts charging towards Michael)

Michael:
No, KITT. You're mine.

KITT:
I have my orders.

Michael:
You're my car, KITT.

KITT:
I obey Graham Deauville.

Michael:
What does KITT stand for? It's the 'Knight Industry Two Thousand. I know that because you're my car.

(KITT reverses slightly)

Deauville:
You obey me. You've been programmed to obey me. Tell him, Bonnie.

Bonnie:
That's right, KITT.

(KITT spins wheels again, about to charge at Michael)

Michael:
No, that's not right! I'm Michael Knight, You are the Knight Industry 2000! You are my car, you belong to me!

Deauville:
KITT!

KITT:
(About to charge at Michael again) I have my orders. I obey Graham Deauville.

Michael:
Then you're gonna have to kill me to stop me!

KITT:
(Starts charging at Michael again) I obey Graham Deauville! (KITT's gauges start flickering, lower voice) I obey Graham Deauville. (even lower voice) I... obey... Graham... Deauville... (stops; normal voice) I can't kill you, Michael. You know that.

Michael:
I was counting on that, pal. You made one big mistake, Deauville. KITT was programmed never ever to take a human life.

Michael:
(to Cole) I'm going to start rattling cages until all the monkeys fall, so you get yourself a real good grip!

Devon:
Michael, please be careful—this semi is worth a king's ransom.

Michael:
Or a Knight's yearly salary.

Devon:
At the very least.

Sheriff:
When the fire department completes its investigation, I want you to stick around.

Michael:
One minute you tell me to leave town, the next minute you tell me to stick around. Fella could get real dizzy listenin' to you, Sheriff.

Devon:
(on videogames) I fail to see how anyone could find something so frivolous entertaining.

Michael:
I'll bet your mother used to say the same thing when you used to run off and play cricket.

KITT:
Since you haven't asked, it was demeaning; demoralizing.

Michael:
What?

KITT:
Police impound.