Open All Hours, Season 1

[First lines. The pilot of Open All Hours opens outside Arkwright's grocers shop, and Albert Arkwright, the shop's proprietor, is working when he sees some bird muck on the shop window]

Arkwright:
Granville, f-f-fetch your cloth. (His errand boy, Granville, who also happens to be his nephew, comes out of the shop and looks for the bird muck) The swallows are leaving, Granville, and they're leaving it on our window.

Granville:
(whining) Why me? (Sees the bird muck) Anything I got a natural affinity for this sort of stuff. (Uses his cloth to remove the bird muck) For this, I did double-entry bookkeeping. It quite clearly underestimates me qualities of leadership.

[Granville approaches Arkwright who is watching Nurse Gladys Emmanuel clean her car]

Arkwright:
I know that face. Nurse Gladys Emmanuel. P-p-possibly the finest backside in the north of England and it all belongs to the state.