Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle

Fearless Leader:
Have you liquidated Moose and Squirrel? Did you use the CDI? Are you talking to me? Are you talking to me? Then who else are you talking to? Are you talking to me? Well, I am the only one here, so you must be talking to me. And you are lying. Now catch Moose and Squirrel. And next time use the CDI on them.

Minnie Mogul:
I can't sign a contract that will help three ruthless villains take over the world. I just can't.

Minnie:
My pen's out of ink.

Narrator:
And then through the miracle of computer-generated digital technology, Minnie reached into the television set and signed the contract. But when she tried to pull the contract out, the expensive animated characters were instantly converted into even more expensive motion picture stars.

Fearless Leader:
Sometimes, it's not so easy being Fearless Leader.

Fearless Leader:
How many times in the past have they stood between me and my dreams of glory? How many times have they foiled my plans with their bungling interference?

Boris:
Er... 28?

Fearless Leader:
There has never been a way to actually destroy a cartoon character until now.

Fearless Leader:
Shut up. This is totally different.

Boris:
We don't need computer weapon to kill moose and squirrel. We've been trying to kill moose and squirrel for 35 years.

Natasha:
And we've never even come close.

Boris:
Exactly.

Karen:
Boris Badenov. I've seen you on TV. You're a crooked, creepy, no-good rotten worm.

Boris:
Oh, thank you.

Karen:
You're slimy, sneaky, sleazy...

Boris:
Please. You'll turn my pretty head.

Karen:
You're a sadistic spy and a really bad person

Boris:
Stop. You're embarrassing me.

Rocky:
Holy smoke, are you all right?

Bullwinkle:
Yes, but I think we're on the wrong show. (looking at Karen) Look how well they drew that girl.

Rocky:
But Bullwinkle, there aren't any more woods.

Bullwinkle:
You don't have to tell me, I'm the Chairman for the Frostbite Falls Society of Wildlife Conversation.

Rocky:
You mean "wildlife conSERVation."

Bullwinkle:
What'd I say?

Rocky:
You said "wildlife conVERSation."

Bullwinkle:
Well, somebody's gonna have to start talking about these things.

Rocky:
Bullwinkle, you weigh 400 imaginary pounds.

Bullwinkle:
Yeah, but it's all moose-le.

Karen:
No, you don't understand. I'm the real Karen Sympathy.

Oklahoma Cop:
Yeah, and I'm really John Goodman.

Martin:
Don't you guys know about faxes?

Lewis:
Yeah, don't you know about E-mail?

Bullwinkle:
Sure. A fax is a little red critter that hunts gesse and chickens. Half of them are males, and the other half are "E-males."

Judge Cameo:
The defendants are charged with grand theft auto: 1 count; breaking out of jail: 1 count; impugning the character of a prison guard: 1 count; reckless driving: 4 counts; talking to the audience; five counts; criminally bad punning: 18 counts.

Bullwinkle:
And three dukes and seven earls. Ha ha ha ha.

Judge Cameo:
Make that 19.

Narrator:
And so RBTV changed its name from Really Bad Television to Rocky and Bullwinkle Television.

Bullwinkle:
What's the difference?

Judge Cameo:
And you, Mr. District Attorney, I'd like to point something out to you in the penal code: Section C, Paragraph 22: "Celebrities are above the law." This case is dismissed.

Karen:
Bullwinkle, can you rappel?

Bullwinkle:
Sure. I've been repelling viewers for years.

Bullwinkle:
Boy, New York sure has changed a lot since my day. They even moved the White House here.

Minnie Mogul:
Too intelligent.

Minnie Mogul:
Too intelligent.

Minnie Mogul:
Too intelligent.

Minnie Mogul:
Hey, how did you do that?

Fearless Leader:
We're attached to the project.

Narrator:
The pun may have been weak but the contract was ironclad.

Narrator:
As dawn broke...

Rocky:
This just wasn't right.

Bullwinkle:
Yeah. Why couldn't you steal something with bucket seats?

Bullwinkle:
What moose can't drive a automobile?

Bullwinkle:
Never said I could drive it well.

Karen:
It's Rocky... and Bull... Bull...

Bullwinkle:
I believe the word you're looking for is "winkle".

Bullwinkle:
Quick! Let's go to a commercial!

Bullwinkle:
What is this? PBS?

Bullwinkle:
Oh man! I was just getting jiggy with it!

Bullwinkle:
Hey, Rocky, your face is all blurry.

Rocky:
Yours too.

Bullwinkle:
This world is starting to look a little...

Rocky:
Don't say it!

Bullwinkle:
Two-demensional.