Black Dynamite

Black Dynamite

Black Dynamite is a 2009 American blaxploitation action comedy film starring Michael Jai White, Tommy Davidson, and Salli Richardson. The film was directed by Scott Sanders and co-written by White, Sanders, and Byron Minns, who also co-stars. The plot centers on former CIA agent Black Dynamite, who must avenge his brother's death while cleaning the streets of a new drug that is ravaging the community. The film is a parody of the blaxploitation genre. It had a trailer and funding even before a script was written. Black Dynamite was shot in 20 days in Super 16 format. The film was released in the United States on October 16, 2009, for only two weeks (with an "official" premiere at the Toronto After Dark film festival) and was well received by critics. It was released on home video on February 16, 2010.

Genre: Action, Comedy
Production: Sony Pictures
  1 win & 4 nominations.
 
IMDB:
7.4
Metacritic:
65
Rotten Tomatoes:
83%
R
Year:
2009
84
$131,862
Website
5,493 Views

[Black Dynamite parks his car and enters his home. Inside, he stores his handgun on a bear statue wearing a holster before sitting down and reading a newspaper. Meanwhile, O'Leary and his men sneak into Black Dynamite's house from the back entrance towards the living room. They point their guns, only to see the bear statue sitting on the couch, wearing Black Dynamite's bathrobe. Black Dynamite appears on the other side of the room, pointing his gun at the agents]

Black Dynamite:
Freeze, turkeys!

O'Leary:
I see you haven't lost your tough, B.D.

Black Dynamite:
O'Leary? [Uncocks handgun]

O'Leary:
The old 'pie in the windowsill' trick. I can't believe I fell for that. That was the same trick you used in 'Nam to save my ass. B.D. took our fatigues and put them on two dead gooks. I remember we circled back and turned the tables.

Black Dynamite:
I guess you forgot about the time you and Bravo company left my black ass for dead, huh? But I remember. I remember everything. I remember Vietnam like it was yesterday. I remember that village in Tainan that we cut down. It was a massacre. All the dead Chinamen we left in our tracks. I remember the faces, the children. This one child I'll never forget. Poor little bastard was still alive. His little Chinese legs were blown clean off! Still see his little shins & feet hanging from the ceiling fan across the hut. He was charred from his head down to his little Chinese knees. He tried to get up, but he fell over when what was left of his right leg broke off. As he laid there, flat on his face, he looked up at me. His little Chinese eyes burned right into my stomach, deep into my soul. He said something to me in Chinese like, 'Boo coo sow!', sounded like some cartoon sh*t. But I understood it to be a question that he was asking me. And I don't have to know how to speak Chinese to know what that question was. 'Why, Black Dynamite? Why?'

[Long pause]

O'Leary:
We're a long way from 'Nam. Look at this place. It must have an eight-track player in every room. What's going on today is a smack problem of epic proportion. Corruption is running rampant and we don't know who to trust. We need you, Black Dynamite, now more than ever.

Black Dynamite:
I know I was the best CIA agent that the CIA ever had, but I thought I told you honkies from the CIA that Black Dynamite was out of the game.

O'Leary:
You're never out of the game.

Black Dynamite:
I've known you for a long time. And there's something you're not telling me.

O'Leary:
Okay. We heard about your brother's death. The last thing we need is you running through the streets creating a river of blood.

Black Dynamite:
Tell me who did it and I'll just leave a puddle.

O'Leary:
We don't know who killed Jimmy. But I do know this. You step out of line, friendship or not, and I'm gonna take you down. Because in case you forgot, when you left the agency, you relinquished your license to kill.

Black Dynamite:
Well, you do what you have to. Just don't get in my way.

[Black Dynamite walks into the militant group's hideout]

Black Dynamite:
Excuse me, brothers.

Militant #3:
[Gets up] The militants turn, startled. This is private. How'd you get in here?

Black Dynamite:
I walked in.

Militant 2:
So you one of them sneaky brothers, huh? Or maybe you an undercover pig. Or maybe you just a federal hitman.

Black Dynamite:
If I was, you cats would already be dead. Now let me speak to the man in charge.

Militant #3:
Sarcastically, I'm in charge. [Exchanges hi-fives with the other militant]

Black Dynamite:
If you were in charge, the people might as well surrender to whitey right now, because your survival skills ain't worth a damn.

Saheed:
Black Dynamite. [Walks into the room] It's been a long time, my brother.

Black Dynamite:
[Exchanging hi-fives with Saheed] What it is, Saheed?

Militant 2:
You know this Uncle Tom?

Black Dynamite:
Listen sucka, I'm blacker than the ace of spades and more militant than you and your whole damn army put together. While you out there, chanting at rallies and brow-beating politicians, I'm taking out any money-fronting sucka on a humble that gets in my way. So I tell you what, when your so called revolution starts, you call me, and I'll be right down front showing you how it's done. But until then, you need to SHUT the F*** UP when grown folks is talking.

Militant 2:
I'm sorry.

Saheed:
Yeah, we heard about what went down at the Hip Pocket. That was righteous.

Black Dynamite:
That was personal, brother.

Saheed:
Personal or not, you saved a lot of brothers and sisters. You need our help, [pounds chest with right fist] we're here.

Black Dynamite:
I can dig it.

[Black Dynamite pulls the bullet casing from his pocket]

Black Dynamite:
What can you tell me about this?

[Saheed takes the casing, sniffs the inside for gunpowder and licks the outer casing]

Saheed:
I ain't seen one of these in a while.

[Black Dynamite and Saheed walk out of the room]

Militant 2:
[Whispers] I was gonna f*** him up.

Bullhorn:
Man, you guys ain't had no waffles like these. These waffles are so good, they're like they come from down South. These buttery motherf***ers will melt in your mouth. Man you ain't had no waffles...

Black Dynamite:
Wait! Bullhorn, what did you just say? You said, 'Melts in your mouth'. Quick... [erases the restaurant menu blackboard] What else melts in your mouth?

Cream Corn:
M&M's!

Black Dynamite:
Exactly. And not in your hands. And who makes M&M's?

Militant #3:
Mars Candy Company make it. Yeah, yeah.

Black Dynamite:
And Mars is also...

Saheed:
The Roman God of War.

Black Dynamite:
Who is the Greek God of War?

Militant 2:
Ares.

Black Dynamite:
Now, you take Mars and spell it backwards, drop the S.

Cream Corn:
Ram. That's right. And ram is the zodialogical sign for Aries. Oh! Now dig. Ares' half-sister is Athena.

Black Dynamite:
Now you're getting it.

Cream Corn:
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Athena, Athens.

Saheed:
Which is the capital of Greece.

Black Dynamite:
And as we all know, zodialogical astronomy was created by the Greeks in...

Cream Corn, Saheed, Militant 2, Militant #3:
785 B.C.

Militant 2:
And 785 is the area code to Topeka. Oh, my God. 785 is the area code to Topeka, Kansas!

Bullhorn, Cream Corn, Saheed, Militant 2, Militant #3:
Code Kansas!

Black Dynamite:
Now take that, spell it backwards and drop the S.

Militant #3:
Snake doc. Snake doctor, yeah!

Black Dynamite:
Yes. And brothers, who is the Greek Demigod of Medicine who believed that snakes' tongues had mystical healing powers?

Cream Corn:
Aesculapius, of course. He had a staff with snakes intertwining all around that b*tch. They called it Aesculapius' staff. It's a symbol the medical field uses to this day.

Black Dynamite:
Now, what legend involving snakes is in both Greek and Roman mythology? Now, come on. It involves Aesculapius' own father.

Woman at table:
Apollo.

Black Dynamite:
Yeah. Thanks, lady.


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