Drake & Josh Go Hollywood

Josh:
Can I ask your opinion on something serious?

Megan:
Is this about your rash?

Josh:
No!

Audrey:
[on why she won't go on a cruise] Boats sink.

Walter:
It's not a boat, it's a ship. And ships don't sink.

Audrey:
Tiiiiiiiiiiitanic.

Walter:
That was just a movie.

Audrey:
Based on a true story!

Walter:
...For real?

Josh:
Where have you been?

Drake:
I told you, I went to go get a corn dog.

Josh:
It took you over an hour just to get one corn dog?!

Drake:
I also had a drink.

Megan:
Do you ever clean this car? It's full of trash.

Drake:
Hey, everything in this car is very important to me!

Megan:
[holding up a dead bird] Like this dead bird?

Drake:
Aw, Tweeter died!

[after airport security had detained Drake and Josh]

Head of Security:
I hope you boys learned a very important lesson on how seriously we take airport security.

Drake:
Oh, we learned... Especially during that strip search.

Josh:
...Which was shockingly thorough.

Head of Security:
We do our best. Have a nice day. [to Josh] And good luck with that rash.

Josh:
[angrily] Yeah, thanks.

Megan:
Excuse me? I think the pilot made a mistake. This plane is going to Denver, right?

Attendant:
No, we're in route to Los Angeles.

Megan:
Los Angeles?

Attendant:
Yes.

Megan:
...Not Denver?

Attendant:
No.

Megan:
...Those dumb b*obs.

[The flight attendant looks down her shirt in confusion]

Drake:
Okay, let's go and get Megan!

Josh:
Okay, but first...

Drake:
What?

Josh:
I gotta pee really bad.

Drake:
Well, can't you hold it?

Josh:
Yeah, I... [strained] No!

Josh:
I can't believe that we're in Los Angeles driving a stolen car!

Drake:
It's not stolen.

Josh:
STOLEN!!!!

Drake:
We borrowed it. Which is a perfectly reitable choice when you're trying to avoid being attacked by two maniacs.