Empty Nest

Dr. Harry Weston:
When you name your daughter Rita, you should probably expect a slut.

Carol Weston:
My biggest fear is that there is no such thing as PMS and that this is who I really am.

Dorothy Zbornak:
How do you do. I'm Dorothy Zbornak.

Laverne Higby Todd Kane:
Geriatrics is two doors down on the left.

Officer Barbara Weston:
[cooking] Charley, don't you want to stay for dinner?

Charley Dietz:
I don't know, Barbara. It smells real bad.

Charley Dietz:
I don't wanna change my image at all. I'm happy with who I am.

Carol Weston:
Mistake.

Dr. Harry Weston:
Laverne, I've just told a ten-year-old boy that he's become a woman!

Laverne Higby Todd Kane:
Then he'll probably be wanting a second opinion

[repeated line]

Carol Weston:
I am sick!

Officer Barbara Weston:
Charley, why do you have beef jerky in your pocket?

Charley Dietz:
Maybe I'm just pleased to see you.

Charley Dietz:
Hi all. Feed me.

Carol Weston:
To what?

Dr. Harry Weston:
Where does the time go?

Carol Weston:
I know what you mean, Daddy. It seems like just yesterday I was sitting on your knee crying like a baby.

Dr. Harry Weston:
That WAS yesterday.

Laverne Higby Todd Kane:
[When asked by Harry how she found out private information] It leaked out of urology