Flodder

Dochter Kees:
[smiling] Hello!

Buurman Neuteboom:
Oh... good afternoon.

Dochter Kees:
I saw you arriving, so I thought: Let's get to know eachother.

Buurman Neuteboom:
Well... that is very kind.

Dochter Kees:
[looking at the flowers] For your wife?

Buurman Neuteboom:
Yes.

Dochter Kees:
[sniffing the flowers] Mmmm, smells very good!

Buurman Neuteboom:
By the way, what is your name?

Dochter Kees:
Kees, just like my brother.

Buurman Neuteboom:
You... don't look like your brother.

Dochter Kees:
Fortunately not. [looks as Neuteboom's car, leaning on it] Beautiful car!

Buurman Neuteboom:
It is a CX 25 GTi with an injection engine.

Dochter Kees:
Injection?

Buurman Neuteboom:
It is an engine that injects the fuel into the cylinders with a high pressure.

Dochter Kees:
You know a lot about it!

Buurman Neuteboom:
I am working at the car branch.

Dochter Kees:
Oh yes?

Buurman Neuteboom:
[closing the garage doors and unties Kees]

Dochter Kees:
Neighbour, what are you doing now?

Buurman Neuteboom:
[horny, whispering] I want you, you are arousing me.

Dochter Kees:
But your wife...?

Buurman Neuteboom:
[starts to wheeze hornily and f***s Kees from behind]

Johnnie:
[showing a portrait to Ma Flodder] Mom, must he be taken with us as well?

Ma Flodder:
Where did you find that? That face I haven't seen for ten years.

Johnnie:
It was under your bed.

Ma Flodder:
Away with that. I don't want to be involved with your father.

Dochter Kees:
[approaches Ma Flodder and looks at the picture] Is that my father?

Ma Flodder:
His father, not yours.

Journalist:
Could we take a photo?

Ma Flodder:
A photo? Of what?

Journalist:
Of the whole family? For the newspaper.

Henkie:
How much money is that?

Ma Flodder:
Yeah... how much is that?

Journalist:
About paying, that is...

Henkie:
100 bucks.

Journalist:
100 guilders?

Ma Flodder:
No, 100 bucks, otherwise no photo!

Ma Flodder:
[throwing rubbish in the bin, but a toy train does not land in the bin but on the floor near the bin. The toy train breaks and something falls out. It seems to be a lot of bank notes held together with an elastic] Now what the heck? [literally: now get the tuberculosis!]

Ma Flodder:
Ma Flodder: [takes more toy trains out of the bin, drops them on the floor so that they break. More banknotes falling out] Now what the heck is this?

[later in the living room]

Johnnie:
What the heck is this?

Ma Flodder:
825.000 guilders!

Johnnie:
[amazed] In his little toy trains?

Ma Flodder:
A nice piece of inheritance!

Jacques 'Sjakie' van Kooten:
[emotional, slightly upset] Deep in their heart, they are... they are very sensitive people!

[On Flodder's old location a lamp falls down and crashes on the floor]

Ma Flodder:
[furious] You dirty b*tch, can't you look out, damnit? [hits Toet]

Whisky:
[barks] Grrrr

Ma Flodder:
[yelling to Whisky] And you, you have to get lost, you shitbag. [kicks Whisky in the pink car]

Whisky:
[howling]

Autoverkoper:
Sorry, Mr. Neuteboom, but the gentlemen...

Buurman Neuteboom:
It is alright, Mr. Van Dijk.

Johnnie, Zoon Kees:
[sit down]

Buurman Neuteboom:
Good afternoon, gentlemen... what could I do for you?

Johnnie:
We are after a car.

Zoon Kees:
[points to the car they want to buy] The red one up there!

Buurman Neuteboom:
[looks backward to the car] The BX Sport is a nice little car!

Johnnie:
Yes, it seems to be for us, yeah! [laughing a bit]

Buurman Neuteboom:
As it is standing there, it is a bit rudimentary. What do you, gentlemen, think of someting additional? Light metal rims. Front and rear spoilers. Head rests. Sports steering wheel.

Johnnie:
Yeah, why not? Go ahead!

Zoon Kees:
Yeah, it is sportsmanlike!

Buurman Neuteboom:
An electric roof... interior made of buffalo leather.

Zoon Kees:
[agitated] Buffalo?

Buurman Neuteboom:
It is a little bit more expensive. But I think that is not a problem for the gentlemen.

Johnnie:
Not a problem at all!

Buurman Neuteboom:
Maybe a full HiFi set. That is also in the budget, right?

Johnnie:
Yeah, I like a good piece of music!

Zoon Kees:
Go ahead. Not a problem at all!

Buurman Neuteboom:
And how do the gentlemen think to pay? Cash, Diners' Club, American Express?

Johnnie:
[get something out of his jacket and shows Neuteboom a photo] Polaroid!

Johnnie, Zoon Kees:
[start laughing]