Foreigner

There must be an audience for Steven Seagal movies, but it's hard to imagine who would actually want to watch a movie like The Foreigner. Seagal, bloated and puffy-faced, plays a super-professional operative of some kind, who on this occasion is supposed to deliver a package from someone (it doesn't matter who) to a super-rich industrialist. The industrialist's beautiful blond wife tries to intercept it, Seagal prevents this, then decides to help her out, and lots and lots of people get killed in impractical and implausible ways. Almost every scene is so full of "mysterious" dialogue as to be incomprehensible. The Foreigner tries to create a veil of cool action attitude to disguise the lack of cool and the lack of action. Seagal mumbles. Seagal frowns. No one shoots Seagal, despite numerous opportunities to do so and no reason not to. Why was this movie made? --Bret Fetzer