Jersey Boys

Bob Gaudio:
[to Tommy DeVito and the other group members, after losing his virginity in a Chicago hotel room at Christmas] You were right. It is better with another person.

Mary:
Do you have a nickel?

Frankie Valli:
Yeah.

Mary:
Call your mother, you're going to be home late.

Bob Gaudio:
Tommy, no stolen goods, okay?

Tommy DeVito:
Stolen goods? No! These fell off a truck.

Bob Gaudio:
[about Bob Crewe] I remember thinking there was something off with this guy. This was 1959, people thought Liberace was just theatrical.

Tommy DeVito:
Here's $3500. DeVito delivers; f*** Vivaldi!

[last lines]

Frankie Valli:
Like that bunny on TV, it just keeps going and going and going. Chasing the music. Trying to find our way home.

Tommy DeVito:
Oh, by the way, if you're ever in Vegas, go to a casino. Say the name, "Tommy DeVito". My hand to God, you'll be outta there in about 12 seconds.

Tommy DeVito:
You know what I do now? I work for Joe Pesci. Little Joey Fishes, same kid I used to smack around. A couple of months ago, we were driving through the old neighborhood. He says "Hey Tommy, how do you remember yourself back then?" I says "I think I was a pretty stand up guy." He says "I gotta be honest with you. You were total prick. Nobody would have put up with your sh*t except we all needed something. Everybody remembers it the way they need to, right?

Nick Massi:
People always ask the same question, why'd you do it Nicky? Why'd you walk away? Well let me clear that up. It wasn't the signed deal, it wasn't the touring, it wasn't the bad food or rooming with Tommy, it just came out of my mouth. Once I said it, I knew it was what I wanted. I wanted to go home.

Frankie Valli:
They ask you "what was the high point?" Hall of Fame, selling all those records, pulling Sherry out of the hat, it was all great. But four guys under a street lamp, when it was all still ahead of us, the first time we made that sound, our sound. When everything dropped away and all there was was the music. That was the best.

Bob Gaudio:
I'm not drawn to the old neighborhood, my life never revolved around the old neighborhood, I don't give a f*** about the old neighborhood. I'm from wherever I happen to be, and these days that's Nashville, Tennessee. Just me, my beautiful wife and a good cigar. Quiet, and peaceful in the knowledge that none of this could have happened without me.

Tommy DeVito:
By the way, if you're ever in Vegas go to down a casino, say the name Tommy DeVito. My hand to god, you'll be out of there in about 12 seconds.

Nick Massi:
Alright, I'll be honest with you. It could have been an ego thing, everybody wants to be up front. But if there is four guys, and you're Ringo? Better I should spend some time with my kids.

Tommy DeVito:
You know what I do now? I work for Joe Pesci. Little Joey Fishes, same kid I used to smack around. A couple of months ago, we were driving through the old neighborhood. He says "Hey Tommy, how do you remember yourself back then?" I says "I think I was a pretty stand up guy." He says "I gotta be honest with you. You were total prick. Nobody would have put up with your sh*t except we all needed something. Everybody remembers it the way they need to, right?

Nick Massi:
People always ask the same question, why'd you do it Nicky? Why'd you walk away? Well let me clear that up. It wasn't the signed deal, it wasn't the touring, it wasn't the bad food or rooming with Tommy, it just came out of my mouth. Once I said it, I knew it was what I wanted. I wanted to go home.

Frankie Valli:
They ask you "what was the high point?" Hall of Fame, selling all those records, pulling Sherry out of the hat, it was all great. But four guys under a streetlamp, when it was all still ahead of us, the first time we made that sound, our sound. When everything dropped away and all there was was the music. That was the best.

Bob Gaudio:
I'm not drawn to the old neighborhood, my life never revolved around the old neighborhood, I don't give a f*** about the old neighborhood. I'm from wherever I happen to be, and these days that's Nashville, Tennessee. Just me, my beautiful wife and a good cigar. Quiet, and peaceful in the knowledge that none of this could have happened without me.

Tommy DeVito:
By the way, if you're ever in Vegas go to down a casino, say the name Tommy DeVito. My hand to god, you'll be out of there in about 12 seconds.

Nick Massi:
Alright, I'll be honest with you. It could have been an ego thing, everybody wants to be up front. But if there is four guys, and you're Ringo? Better I should spend some time with my kids.

Frankie Valli:
Like that bunny on TV with the battery, I just keep going and going and going. Chasing the music. Trying to get home.

Frankie Valli:
I mean, this woman - People turn into something.

Frankie Valli:
Tommy you don't give a sh*t about the group, you never have. It's always been whatever it is you got going and then there's the group. You never want to rehearse, you drop Nicky to drink, you put Bob through the ringer, and forget about trying to mess with my head, which you've done from day one. You know the shame of it is you're not a bad musician if you give a little time, but no. You're too busy shooting your mouth off or buying apartments to keep your girlfriends in. But no more. All that bullshit is over.

Tommy DeVito:
Is this how you talk to your friends?

Frankie Valli:
Friends, right. Not one Christmas present, not one Christmas card. The one time we go for a mean and you pick up the cheque. The one time you ask me how my kids are doing, how I'm doing! God help me Tommy, part of me would really like to see you hurt.

Nick Massi:
Excuse me, with all due respect, he opened it up, I'm gonna say something. I've been rooming with this guy on and off for what is it, ten years? This was not a walk in a park, this was a sentence. A ten year sentence. The man is a personal nightmare. He wears the same underwear 3 days running. He takes no pride in his appearance in the simple amenities of life. You wanna talk about towels? The man cannot be in a hotel without using all the towels. I'm talking face towels, bath towels, the bathmat, the little washcloths like he's living alone. You need a towel, you know where it is? In a wet pile on the floor. I come back to the room one time, the man is pissing in the sink.

Tommy DeVito:
I never pissed in the sink.

Nick Massi:
Right in the sink, right in the f***ing sink! I say "Tommy, what's wrong with you? There's a toilet over there." He says "This was closer." This is what I'm dealing with! The man is not properly socialized. Frankie doesn't have to deal with it, Gaudio doesn't, I've had to deal with it. TEN YEARS!

Gyp DeCarlo:
Ok Nick, thank you for sharing. Now, Norman. We're gonna take a little walk, work things out, I want you boys to put your heads together and see what you can come up with. And you, hey. Stay out of my bathroom.

Frankie Valli:
Maybe Gyp can talk some sense into this guy.

Tommy DeVito:
Forget sense. Forget sense. I got a couple of things I could... I could work something out.

Nick Massi:
What, pull a job? Hey, he's gonna roll a 7-11, like the old days.

Tommy DeVito:
Alright Nicky, shut your trap alright, and drink your wine! DeCarlo's not running this group, I am. I don't even know what we're doing here, begging Gyp for help. You make me look like an a**hole, all of ya's.

Nick Massi:
You do that all by yourself Tommy.

Frankie Valli:
Fellas, can we please talk about...

Tommy DeVito:
You know what'd be nice, since I was here before any of you? A little respect.

Nick Massi:
For what, getting 162 in the hole?

Tommy DeVito:
You know something? At least I tried, huh? You think it's easy running the group? Dealing with the club owners, the managers, the record companies? Everybody trying to f*** you five ways from Sunday? You don't care how it gets done Nicky, I took care of it! Me!

Frankie Valli:
Sit down.

Bob Crewe:
You guys are not hearing it like I do!

Tommy DeVito:
I'm sor... I'm sorry Crewe, how do you hear it?

Bob Crewe:
I'm hearing it in sky blue and you're giving me brown.

Tommy DeVito:
Maybe that's because you're paying us sh*t.

Bob Crewe:
Excuse me?

Tommy DeVito:
I'm sorry Crewe, famous ears clogged up? I'll say it into the mike. Maybe because you're paying us f***ing sh*t!

Bob Crewe:
Alright, is there a problem Tommy?

Tommy DeVito:
Yeah, there's a problem!

Tommy DeVito, Bob Crewe:
Ok, let's see what the goddamn problem is.

Tommy DeVito:
Oh, we got his attention, he's coming down. About f***ing time.

Tommy DeVito:
You wanna hear the real story? I'm the one you wanna talk to: Tommy DeVito. Wasn't for me, we all would have wound up in the trunk of somebodies car with a bullet in our head. There's even a street named after me. Of course, it don't come easy. You gotta have skills, talent and vision. And luck!

Nick Massi:
Bob will tell you it was all smooth sailing right up until we hit the iceberg with Tommy and the $150 thousand. That's Bob. Who was always looking so far into the future he never saw what was going on under his nose. Fact is, the trouble didn't start at the Sullivan Show. It started long before that.

Tommy DeVito:
Hey Nicky! Remember when we couldn't get arrested?

Bob Gaudio:
When was that, Tommy? When you were three?

Bob Gaudio:
You know, this may come as a surprise to you, Tommy, but I don't HAVE a police record!

Tommy DeVito:
Yeah? Well, it's never too late to start.

Frankie Valli:
Tommy you don't give a sh*t about the group, you never have. It's always been whatever it is you got going and then there's the group. You never want to rehearse, you drop Nicky to drink, you put Bob through the ringer, and forget about trying to mess with my head, which you've done from day one. You know the shame of it is you're not a bad musician if you give a little time, but no. You're too busy shooting your mouth off or buying apartments to keep your girlfriends in. But no more. All that bullshit is over.

Tommy DeVito:
Is this how you talk to your friends?

Frankie Valli:
Friends, right. Not one Christmas present, not one Christmas card. The one time we go for a meal and you pick up the cheque. The one time you ask me how my kids are doing, how I'm doing! God help me Tommy, part of me would really like to see you hurt.

Tommy DeVito:
"Watch this I bet she cries."

Bob Crewe:
"Big girls don't cry."