Marblehead Manor

Jerry Stockton:
[training Rick in etiquette] You what Rick needs? A mnemonic!

Dwayne Stockton:
That some kinda brain operation?

Rick:
No I don't want that!

Jerry Stockton:
A mnemonic is a word or a rhyme that will help you remember something. For instance: [holds up a butter knife]

Jerry Stockton:
"This knife's not a cutter / It's used for butter."

Rick:
The knife's not a cutter... it's used for butter.

Jerry Stockton:
[holds up a spoon] "This spoon is wee / It's used for tea!"

Rick:
[gets it] This spoon is wee / It's used for tea!

Albert Dudley:
[looks at a glass] Well, now... "This glass is for wine, a meal to enhance"...

Rick:
You drink too much, you'll wet your pants! [Albert hits Rick with his hat]

Albert Dudley:
Your salad, sir!

Rick:
"Salad, my friend / Use the fork on the end!"

[Rick sees Randolph blowing on his soup, and smacks him]

Rick:
"Only a stoop / blows on his soup!"

[Elvis comes to Rick's treehouse]

Rick:
Who's the greatest actor on television?

Elvis:
Pee Wee Herman?

Rick:
Come on up.

Albert Dudley:
Where did this baby come from?

Rick:
Well, when a man and a woman love each other very much...

Albert Dudley:
We're in big trouble here, Rick has stolen a baby!

Dwayne Stockton:
A-and?

Albert Dudley:
And we've got a problem! Think of the scandal! Stonehill's stock will plummet, and we'll all be out of a job!

Rick:
HE'S GONE, BACK TO VENUS!... Live long, and prosper.

[last lines]

[Randolf discovers a milk bottle]

Randolf Stonehill:
Hilary... you promised you wouldn't! HILARY!

[Despite the efforts of Rick, Albert and Dwayne, the baby keeps crying]

Rick:
Albert, I think I've found the problem.

Albert Dudley:
You have? Then would you care to share it with us, hmmm?

Rick:
His pants are all ishy.

Albert Dudley:
Ishy? Ishy? And what, pray, is the definition of... oh. [all three awkwardly withdraw their hands]

Dwayne Stockton:
Well, I'm not gonna change him!

Rick:
[puts on his gardening gloves] I'll do it.

Albert Dudley:
No, no, no, I'll do it! [speaks to the baby in a soothing manner]

Albert Dudley:
Now, now, it's all right, Uncle Albert's here... there we go. [removes the baby's diaper, and the baby pees on him]

Dwayne Stockton:
Aww, it's a boy!

[the gorilla roars at Albert]

Albert Dudley:
[groans] Your breath! Have you been at the mackerel pate again?

Albert Dudley:
Well, who are you, then?

Rick:
He's a real gorilla! [everybody runs]

[the gorilla abducts Mr Stonehill]

Dwayne Stockton:
I sure hope he has his wame shut!

Albert Dudley:
...Which one?

Dwayne Stockton:
The gorilla!