Minnâ-yatteruka!

Man In Car:
Tell me, miss - do you know about... car sex?

Car Salesman:
What kind of car are you looking for?

Asao:
Something I can have sex in.

Car Salesman:
...I see.

Airplane Pilot:
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome aboard Instant Hell Airlines.

[Asao drives up in a car making a loud tin-can clattering sound]

Car Salesman:
...Just married?

Asao:
No, what the f*** do you think? The car's defective!

Car Salesman:
Oh, my fault. I forgot to tell you. The cigarette lighter doesn't work.

Scientist:
So, tell me... why do you want to be invisible?

Asao:
I want to peep.

Scientist:
Peeping. A very concise and powerful reason!

Scientist:
How tall are you?

Asao:
One hundred seventy-five acres.

Scientist:
One hundred seventy-five acres?... How about weight?

Asao:
Sixty-eight gallons.

Recruitment Announcer:
The Earth Defense Force is seeking new members! Educational background, IQ, and sexual preference are all no problem. Neither is the shape of your penis.

[The Earth Defense Force recruiters are discussing promotion ideas]

Earth Defense Force Member 1:
What about Astro-Vision?

Earth Defense Force Member 2:
You mean Hibino's Astro-Vision?

Earth Defense Force Member 1:
Why be so specific?

Earth Defense Force Member 2:
We get a rental fee discount if we say the name on screen.

Asao's Mother:
Asao! Don't make a fool of yourself!

Asao's Sister:
Asao, come down here!

[Asao/Flyman dumps a load onto her forehead]

Asao's Mother:
I think... he's angry.

Bathhouse Manager:
Sir, this bath is for ladies only.

Scientist:
It's OK. I'm a sissy.

Bathhouse Manager:
...No.

Asao:
Miss?

Woman:
Yes?

Asao:
Would you like a ride with me?

Woman:
What for?

Asao:
Car sex?

Woman:
A**hole!

Asao:
[confused] What, not your thing?

[in a Mercedes Benz dealership]

Car Salesman:
How much did you intend to spend?

Asao:
About $2,000.

Asao:
Can we split it 50-50?

Gold Miner:
I've already done some work. I want 70.

Asao:
Then we go 70-70.

Gold Miner:
What nonsense, the sum has to be 100.

Asao:
Then I'll take 150 and you take minus 50.