Motherhood

[reading from her 500-word motherhood-themed article for submission to a magazine prize contest]

Eliza:
Motherhood is about accepting the limitations of time and energy which stretch beyond you, even though sometimes it feels they can consume you. Search for and hold on to your own true self. If you lose that, what kind of mother can you be? Things are always changing no matter how much we might want things to stay the same. You could take a picture of your kids every single day and every single day they'd just be getting older. That's a fact, a heartbreaking fact, but still a fact. / So, seize your days and dwell in them fully. Look to your children because they know how to inhabit brief periods of time with extreme passion. And for nothing more, really, than the sake of those moments. They can help you remember that, if you only slow down and let them. Feel fortunate because chances are good you actually might be.

Woman in Bakery Line:
You have to admit it's your own fault. If you have named her Sophie or Ella you wouldn't be having this problem. But you gave her an Edna name.

Eliza:
A what?

Woman in Bakery Line:
You know, an Edna name? Like Mabel or Agnes or Velma...

Bakery Clerk:
Yeah like lesbian librarian names.

Woman in Bakery Line:
Don't you read the Crankypants Post? She did a whole thing last week about names, it was genius.

Eliza:
Well, yes, I mean I do read her but I like other parenting blogs better. What about Bjorn Identity?

Woman in Bakery Line:
That woman is so... I dunno. I think she's a feminist.

Eliza:
Well, what could be worse than that? Anyway, Clara is not an Edna name, right?

Woman in Bakery Line:
Let me guess, you named her after your favourite grandmother?

Eliza:
Stop.