Oh! Susanna

Lt. Col. Unger:
Now I know how officers hate sergeants. Seems to be regulations, so I hate sergeants, especially sergeants who can't remember who's in command. All right, for a couple of months Captain Calhoun had this post, but I've been here long enough for even a sergeant to know I've taken over. So if I catch any sergeants - and I hate sergeants - making a report to Captain Calhoun before he makes it to me, I'll tear off his chevrons so quick his arms will come with 'em.

Trumpeter Benton:
Four separate battles?

Trooper Riorty:
Well, you see, I, uh, I joined up late.

Capt. Webb Calhoun:
If you keep looking for trouble as carefully as you have tonight, you're liable to find it.

Lt. Col Unger:
I don't care a bubble in a dirty river what you think of me. The big point is I don't like the way you let your schoolboy ideas stand in the way of doing a man's job.

Sgt. Barhydt:
Yes sir, Mr. Cutter, I figured maybe you could set me straight.

Lt. Cutter:
On what, Sergeant?

Sgt. Barhydt:
Why is it, sir, meaning no disrespect, sir, nobody wants to be a second lieutenant?

Lt. Cutter:
All right, I guess every shavetail that's been out on a day's patrol with you has had to listen to this one. Let's have it, Sergeant.

Sgt. Barhydt:
Well, sir, and I'll give up a day's pay if I'm wrong. A private wants to be a corporal, and a corporal wants to be a sergeant. But does a sergeant want to be a second lieutenant? Captains are right glad to be captains; majors and colonels are glad to be majors and colonels. But even a second lieutenant doesn't want to be a second lieutenant. Looking for something, sir?

Lt. Cutter:
Yes, a good answer, Sergeant.

Jake Ledbetter:
We didn't move out yesterday when some whipper-snapper Lieutenant told us to, and we're not moving out today! The yellow stuff in that creek back there tells us we're going to stay right here for quite a spell.

Trooper Muro:
(to other troopers) Answer me this. How do they better themselves with the top of their heads gone?

Capt. Webb Calhoun:
Open the gate, Sergeant. Muro, give me your saber.

Sgt. Barhydt:
Sir, you're not going to let 'em in!

Capt. Webb Calhoun:
That's the sign for palaver. I'm going out.

Sgt. Barhydt:
But they're Sioux! That don't mean nothing but a trap. I'm going with you!

Capt. Webb Calhoun:
You'll stay here... just in case. Open the gate!

Sgt. Barhydt:
Just in case he don't come back.

Trooper Muro:
If he don't come back, there won't be any case.

Charlie Grass:
Sioux? There's no Sioux around here. I got a nose for Sioux!

Capt. Webb Calhoun:
You gotta nose for whiskey, Charlie!

Sgt. Barhydt:
You notice he's still got his hair? That's so when he walks around in the hereafter, everybody will know he wasn't even worth scalping.

Trumpeter Benton:
Wishing you could fill up on whiskey, Mr. Riorty?

Trooper Riorty:
I told ya, whiskey don't make a man brave. It just helps him forget he's petrified!