On the Job

Sara:
Yeah we can't have the party on Saturday because my grandma is having an abortion!

Richard:
Your grandma is having an abortion?

Sara:
She's just going through a really rough time.

Richard:
She didn't use a condom?

Sara:
No, I mean, you wouldn't think but this is the seventh time this has happened since she hit menopause. Most of them just fall out.

Richard:
You're so full of sh*t.

Richard:
I bought spicy hummus and light beer? Who the f*** am I Selena Gomez?

Arianna:
Oh you'll love Richard. He's gay, fabulous, and single.

Chaz:
Oh. Oh, that's not me. I mean I don't care or anything but I play for the other team.

Arianna:
Really? Hmm. I'm usually good at that. Well, we need a metrosexual in the house so it's fine.