Private Practice

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
I wish i was a little bit more like you.

Dr. Addison Montgomery:
What an adulterous b*tch who forgot to have kids?

Dr. Addison Montgomery:
I do not want to be just another... notch in your... acupuncture table.

Dr. Violet Turner:
[to Cooper] What do you know about women that you didn't get off the internet?

Dr. Cooper Freedman:
You are listening to Alan's message again?

Dr. Violet Turner:
I have other messages. From patients.

Dr. Cooper Freedman:
Do your patients tell you to pick up Chienese and that they love you?

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
It is raining.

Dr. Sam Bennett:
You're wet.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
Because it is raining. It rains in Seattle were I left my umbrella it does not rain in Los Angeles.

William 'Dell' Cooper:
It rains in L.A. It's raining right now.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
[ironic] Really? Right now?

Dr. Violet Turner:
You know, I am good. I am brillant. I had a patient this morning, trapped for 19 years in a mariage. But today he's ready to ask for a divorce. I got him out of this! He's ready to move on.

Dr. Pete Wilder:
You like yourself and awful lot today!

Dr. Violet Turner:
I kick ass in my job. I rule.

Dr. Pete Wilder:
[the patient comes up with his wife, who's nose is bleeding. She screams at Violet] You do. You do rule.

Mother:
I don't mean to be a bother. I had to bring Erin back she's just so... blue.

Dr. Cooper Freedman:
Oh, it's gotta be hard on her.

Mother:
It's terrible.

Dr. Cooper Freedman:
It's normal for kids to feel a little down when they're sick, It's really nothing to worry about.

Mother:
What? No! She's blue!

Dr. Cooper Freedman:
Understood!

Mother:
Light Blue!

Dr. Cooper Freedman:
ok [realized what she just said] What?

Patient:
[talking about her vagina] Oh my god, it's broken. It's broken isn't it?

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
It's not the kind of thing that breaks.

Dr. Pete Wilder:
You are talking about sex, aren't you?

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
We are talking about a patient who can't have sex.

Dr. Pete Wilder:
You send her my way, I'm gonna get her going.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
You know, this is a very serious issue. This is a women who has needs, who has wants, who needs and wants magic in her life. This is not a dirty little joke, you can make your dirty little jokes about, dirty man.

Dr. Pete Wilder:
You don't know me at all. You think you do, but you don't. So, don't call me names.

Dr. Violet Turner:
You're realizing that you're replacing sex with food?

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
Why is everyone always pushing Pete on me?

Dr Naomi Bennett:
Why are you pushing so hard against him?

William 'Dell' Cooper:
[gives Naomi a cake] Double Fudge.

Dr Naomi Bennet:
[she takes it and is about to walk away. Then she suddently changes her mind and put the cake back on the counter] You know what? Enough with the cake! I don't want your cake. I don't need your cake. I-I didn't ask for your cake. I'm all caked out. You know who's cake I want? I want Sam's cake. I want Sam's cake, but Sam's not baking a cake for me. So could you just...

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
Nae... [she turns to Dell] Dell she's... uhm... she's gone off sugar for a while.

William 'Dell' Cooper:
[to Naomi] I'm not gonna stop bringing you cake. [Naomi wants to attack Dell, but Addison and Violet hold her back]

Dr. Violet Turner:
[as she and Addison pull Naomi away] Dell, no more cake.

Dr Naomi Bennet:
You know, Maya likes Sam better, you are mad at me for bringing you here and this boy is baking cakes at me.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
Ok, we are gonna get through this.

Dr Naomi Bennet:
We are?

Dr. Violet Turner:
Yes, we are all gonna get through this. That's why you have us.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
We are gonna get through this together.

Dr Naomi Bennet:
Just, when is something good gonna happen? When is there gonna be a little magic?

Dr Naomi Bennet:
Nae that's the unending question.

Dr. Pete Wilder:
[talking to his dead wife] You put our dog to sleep, you never took my side, you were mean to me, you withheld sex, you were cold, you were a mean cold b*tch and I hate you! I hate you so much [he kicks her gravestone. He then steps away and looks at for a while before he kneels down to it] I'm sorry I couldn't save you.

Dr. Addison Montgomery:
Angie, you have a disease and you will die, thats the truth. Hiding it from Ray is not going to change that. But the bigger truth, the better truth, is that you are alive now. You're living, and you should get, you should get everything that life has to offer. You should get what you want. You should get to have a child, and a family, and Ray. Just because you're sick doesn't mean you don't get to live your life! Go home, tell Ray the truth, tell him what the future is, and let him decide. A person should get to have a whole life.

William 'Dell' Parker:
You are the practice. You keep it running, the way you deal with the patients, the way you care. Your dream is what started it in the first place.

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
And Sam's.

William 'Dell' Parker:
And Sam's. But I do it for you.

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
God's trying to tell us something. We have sex and the day after our priest summons us. It's the fires of Hell, Sam! We had sex!

Dr. Pete Wilder:
What is it about Addison that makes me act like a 14 year-old boy?

Ashley Minahan:
[after delivering her fourth son] No! You shove that boy back up there and pull out a girl!

Dr. Sam Bennett:
You have something

Ginger:
[Ginger laughs] Thanks. You're sweet too

Dr. Sam Bennett:
No, you got something right here [pointing at a rash on her backside]

Ginger:
Huh?

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Hey Man, what were you thinking?

Dr. Pete Finch:
It's a long sad story

Dr. Cooper Freedman:
Did you do the thing were she... [Addison and Noami enter the room]... uhm could be Pneumonia...

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
I am asking because I'm curious *not* because I care. What's her name?

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Who's name?

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
The girl... the girl Sam

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Ginger

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
Her name is Ginger?

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Hey I did not name her. I didn't hold her up to the Moon and did the whole thing. This isn't roots

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
Oh you're funny. You're funny man

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Her name is Ginger!

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
Did you sleep with Ginger?

Dr. Sam Bennett:
And you're asking because you're curious?

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
Yeah

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Yes

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
SAMUEL!

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
No I didn't. I just wanted to see what curiosity looked like- it's an awful lot like jealousy

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
I am *not* jealous

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Ohh yes you are

Dr. Sam Bennett:
[talking about a patient, as he stands in front of just that patient's door] Dave probably gets to see strippers. He most probably got one in there right now

Dr. Charlotte King:
This hospital's been 124 years building this reputation. I'm not gonna ruin that by chatting with you.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
Tell me that is NOT the girl from last night

Dr. Violet Turner:
Cooper's bringing them to work now?

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
Oh my god, that's it. He's just crossed the line. [the watch Sam hugging Ginger] Sam just hugged a stripper

Dr. Violet Turner:
Oh god, at least with Cooper you know what you have

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
Now let's all calm down. Sam is not a dog, he never was. And their could be a totally innocent explanation for this

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
For stripper hugging? Give me one! Give me one!

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
[they see Pete and Ginger shaking hands] Like: She's here to see the real dog

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
Hey! Is that stripper still in your office?

Dr. Pete Finch:
Entertainer, not stripper. And yes.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
And she's been in there all day? Why?

Dr. Pete Finch:
We're trying a few different techniques

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
[laughing] Yeah, I'm sure you are. You know what? Noami does not need Ginger throw in her face

Dr. Pete Finch:
Noami is a big girl. She can handle this

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
But she doesn't have to that's why i'm here

Ginger:
[from inside is office] Pete, is it supposed to feel tingly?

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
[mockingly copies Ginger] Pete is it supposed to feel... you know what? Go! Go do take care of your poor little stripper girl and her tigeling

Dr. Pete Finch:
Entertainer! And why are you so angry at me? Cooper the one...

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
[interrupting him] I am trying to take care of my friend and Cooper is bad. But you are worse and you know why? Because you're slippery. Yeah, you walk around pretending to be all soulful but you don't take the heat. You just do whatever you wanna do and you evade, evade, evade.

Dr. Pete Finch:
You want me to kiss you again

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
NO!

Dr. Pete Finch:
Okay

Gloria Walker:
Stevie, close the door honey

Stevie Walker:
I'll leave it open so next time Dad passes out no one's gotta break a window to get in.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
I'll get you a tissue

Dr. Charlotte King:
I'm fine

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
It's okay. It's been a big day

Dr. Charlotte King:
Montgomery, I'm chief to over 200 physicians. You call this big day? This place is making you soft

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
No Ginger. She can't be her. Ginger can't be her.

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Okay, you're gonna have to translate from freaked out language to normal people language.

Dr. Pete Wilder:
[Addison is annoyed about Pete and the stripper] I know you don't believe me, but I like my women real. Real skin, real breasts. Real lines around their eyes that mean they've really lived and had pain. You show me that woman, and i'm interested. And not in a slippery way. [walks towards the door, then stops and looks back at Addison] And Addison, I think it's great you try to take care of Naomi. But who takes care of you?

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
I'm changing my life. Now I can walk away angry or I can walk away with your blessing. Either way Richard: I'm going.

Richard Webber:
You think you're gonna go there and do what? Wear jeans, walk on the beach, dance in your underwear?

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
Maybe I'll dance naked.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
It's not like I look bad naked. A lot of man have enjoyed seen me naked, a lot. Well not a lot... I mean... eight... well... eleven.

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Naomi's trying to show that she has the power.

Dr. Pete Finch:
Why did Addison take the job anyway? Wasn't she some big hotshot in Seattle?

Dr. Violet Turner:
Is it just me or did Naomi just run over us?

Dr. Pete Finch:
Is she crazy?

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Naomi's insane

Dr. Pete Finch:
I mean Addison. Is she some kind of crazy person who gets kissed once and decides to change her whole life?

Dr. Violet Turner:
Sam you gotta do something.

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Ya... what ME?

Dr. Violet Turner:
This divorce is killing us. You need to apologize

Dr. Pete Finch:
Just say you're wrong for walking out so we can go back to being a happy family.

Dr. Violet Turner:
Yeah

Dr. Sam Bennett:
I never... I... I didn't... I am not apologizing to her. She's the one. Noami hires Addison and then moves her in right next door to me. I saw her naked this morning.

Dr. Cooper Freedman:
You saw her naked?

Dr. Pete Finch:
She looked good naked?

Dr. Charlotte King:
You got a way to fight me or this, I'd like to see you try.

Dr. Sam Bennett:
I'm calling Naomi on you.

Dr. Pete Finch:
Hey listen, you moving here, it didn't have anything to do with me kissing you did it?

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
What?

Dr. Pete Finch:
It's okay, it's just that, well... no it's just a kiss.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
I think that I moved here because you kissed me?

Dr. Pete Finch:
It was a good kiss. It was an excellent kiss, by the...

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
Stop talking. All right? I did not move here because you kissed me.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
Shut up, just go in there and do your little Eastern Voodoo thing you do. Let's help that girl have her baby in piece.

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Besides, I got mad.

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
You got mad?

Dr. Sam Bennett:
I got mad

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
*You* got mad?

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Apparently neither one of us can make decisions when their mad.

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
Okay now I'm mad.

Dr. Sam Bennett:
I told you.

William Cooper:
You don't take me seriously.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
What?

William Cooper:
You think I'm some dumb surfer boy. You think I'm eye-candy. You have no respect for me or my midwifery skills.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
I've total respect for you and your... midwifery skills? Is that even a word? Midwifery?

William Cooper:
It's a word! It's definitely a word.

Dr. Pete Finch:
Did I or did I not say trust me?

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
You did, and I do... now.

Dr. Violet Turner:
Thanks, for coming down.

Dr. Cooper Freedman:
I'm a better person than you are.

Dr. Violet Turner:
We're a team. We're partners Naomi.

Dr. Sam Bennett:
You can't just bring somebody in...

Dr. Pete Finch:
Without asking us.

Dr. Cooper Freedman:
Yeah.

Dr. Sam Bennett:
We're democracy, we vote.

Dr. Violet Turner:
Yeah, we vote or it doesn't happen.

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
You're right, we should have voted. I was wrong.

Dr. Violet Turner:
Good. Okay. Let's vote.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery:
Hold on a minute. I have been working here for less than 24 hours and in that time I discovered that I'm not welcome here. I learned that I'm a one man gynie show AND I performed crazy surgery. And Sam saw my bootie. So, this has not been a great day for me. This day kinda sucked. But you know what? I had one patient. One patient- the entire day! And I loved it. So you want me gone? Too bad! I'm in! I'm putting my food down. My foot's down, it's down. I'm not going anywhere. So... yeah, I thought I... I thought I had a big finish but I don't so... I'm done [she sits down. A few second of silence before Addison gets up again] No NO! I do have a big finish. If I hadn't been here today, if you had someelse than that girl would have died delivering her baby. I saved her life. I saved your asses. I'm a world class Neonatal Surgeon- and I'm here to stay. Welcome to the new Oceanside Wellness [Addison walks off, everyone stares after her]

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
That's why I didn't tell you she was coming.

Dr. Charlotte King:
No way I'm gonna let you molest your husband's corpse!

Sheldon Wallace:
[to Miranda] I'm furious at you. You don't get to tell me to walk away, and you don't get to tell me that this is *your* journey and not mine. I am on this road. I've been on this road for fifty-six years, all by myself, and then you showed up - on my road. And that day, and every say since, have been the greatest days of my life. So I am *not* leaving you. And I'm happy to change diapers and to wipe drool, and to hold your hand, 'cause I want to take care of you. I am honored to take care of you. Your last days will be precious, and I'll cherish them. And if you too far gone to remember my name, then I'll remind you. But you deserve to be loved. Right up until the very last moment. You deserve to be surrounded by love. You deserve to have the face of the man who loves you be the last thing that you see. And I deserve the chance to love you for as long as I can, for as hard as I can. So I am *not* walking away.

Dr. Naomi Bennett:
Climb Mount Kilimanjaro? With or without your inhaler?

Dr. Sam Bennett:
Don't mock my list.

Dr. Meg Porter:
And thank you, for being happier when I'm here.

Dr. Addison Montgomery:
...I'm so tired of complicated. Why can't more things be easy?

Dr. Pete Wilder:
You know what the problem is? We expect too much. We just expect to be happy. What gives us the right? Well, either that or we try too hard. I mean, I never wanted a kid. I got one. I didn't try for it. I just got one. The best thing that ever happened to me.

Dr. Addison Montgomery:
So you think we find happiness by accident?

Dr. Pete Wilder:
Maybe.

William 'Dell' Parker:
The carpets are beige. The walls are beige. The neighborhhod is beige. My whole life is beige.

Dr. Addison Montgomery:
I'm a cheater and a husband stealer and I'm barren. Good times.