Real Men

Nick:
You've got a sense of humor Bob... I like that in a man.

Bob:
What do you like in a woman?

Nick:
Big tits.

Nick:
We're as safe here as we are anywhere.

Bob:
How safe is that?

Nick:
Oh, not very.

Bob:
They're gonna shoot at us, aren't they?

Nick:
Probably, Bob. It's what they brought the guns for.

Bob:
What are they trying to do?

Nick:
They're trying to kill me. They know I can't afford a loss like that.

Bob:
I didn't know you smoked.

Nick:
Just after sex, Bob. I'm trying to give it up.

Bob:
Well, at least you don't smoke that much.

Nick:
About a pack a day.

Bob:
That'll kill ya!

Nick:
Bob, it won't kill ya. But it will make you very sore.

Bob:
Who Are Those Clowns?

Bob:
They're destroying my ducks!

Nick:
Will you look at the tits on this guy?

Bob:
You're kidding! What idiots think up something like that?

Nick:
I dunno Bob, I think there's a special department of idiots in the White House who do that.