Smurfs

Gargamel:
Ooo, those goody-goody Smurfs make me sick!

Azrael the Cat:
Reow-row-row-reowww!

[repeated line]

Brainy Smurf:
Is it much further Papa Smurf?

Papa Smurf:
Not much further my little smurfs.

Jokey Smurf:
[different location] Is it much further Papa Smurf?

Papa Smurf:
Not much Further my little smurfs

Grouchy Smurf:
[third location] Is it much further papa smurf?

Papa Smurf:
Yes it is!

Papa Smurf:
Everyone what are the first two rules of Smurfdom? #1

Smurfette, Brainy Smurf, Clockwork Smurf, Miner Smurf, Greedy Smurf, Grouchy Smurf, Jokey Smurf:
[in unison] No casting spells on your own.

Papa Smurf:
And #2?

Smurfette, Brainy Smurf, Clockwork Smurf, Miner Smurf, Greedy Smurf, Grouchy Smurf, Jokey Smurf:
[in Unison] Don't go into Pappa Smurf's lab without permission.

Papa Smurf:
Nature Smurf, this time your love of animals has gone too far.

Natural 'Nat' Smurf:
I can't help it, Papa Smurf. Azrael got his foot caught in one of Gargamel's traps. I couldn't just leave him there to die.

Papa Smurf:
Okay, but as soon as his foot is better, then back he goes. Understand?

[Hogatha goes over to the mirror after Gargamel leaves with the magic whistle]

Hogatha:
Oooh, what a man! But why should I be surprised? After all, I have charm... I have beauty... I have a beard...

Hogatha:
[Notices the fake beard on her face] A BEARD? Oh no... it was Gargamel! Where is he? Where is that impostor?

[Hogatha runs out of her castle, tears the fake beard off her face, and stomps on it in anger]

Brainy Smurf:
[Over-reacting] We're gonna starve! We're all gonna starve! [Crying and putting his hands on Smurfette's back] I can't believe it. Me, cut down to the prime of my smurfiness!

Brainy Smurf:
Listen, Lazy. Don't feel so bad. Red, green, purple, who cares. It's being a Smurf that counts. As I said to Papa Smurf...

Papa Smurf:
Brainy, please! [Holds his left arm to Lazy's back and speaks to him] Mother Nature meant no harm, Lazy.

Lazy Smurf:
She ruined my Halloween.

Brainy Smurf:
No she didn't. Look at this way. Now you don't need a costume. [laughs]

Papa Smurf:
Brainy!

Brainy Smurf:
Maybe being red has some compensation you haven't even considered yet, like...

Papa Smurf:
Brainy!

Smurfette:
[Cries] Ooo... No... Noooo!

Gargamel:
Yes, Yes! [laughs]

Gargamel:
Am I seeing things or are you a little blue person?

Brainy Smurf:
Me, blue? Ha, ha, ha. No, it's just a pigment of your imagination.

Gargamel:
[singing] Oh, I'm evil. Needy evil...

Papa Smurf:
[Watching outside from a window in Gargamel's hovel] It's hard to believe...

Jokey Smurf:
[Gargamel continues singing in the background] That Gargamel has become a Smurfberry bush?

Papa Smurf:
[Closes his eyes in disgust] No, that anyone can sing so terribly!

Vanity Smurf:
Pardon, Your Highness, but I seem to drop my mirror.

Princess Periwrinkle:
Oh, [Taking Vanity's mirror and admiring what she sees in it] I would'nt worry about it. You won't need it. You couldn't stand watching what's going to happen to you!

Vanity Smurf:
[Shocked then trying to free himself] Me?

Vanity Smurf:
Where are you taking me?

Princess Periwrinkle:
To the mud factories.

Vanity Smurf:
Oh good, I haven't have a facial in ages.

Princess Periwrinkle:
A facial? My dear, you're going to get the works!

Vanity Smurf:
[Surprised while speaking to himself] I don't like the way she said that.

Hefty Smurf:
Alloweth me Smurfette. [Places a blanket on a mud hole for Smurfette to cross]

Smurfette:
Why thank you Hefty... [Screams as she falls into the mud hole with the blanket she stepped on. Only her head is shown. She then looks at Hefy with an angry face]

Hefty Smurf:
[Looking at the television audience] I gotta sinking feeling that I'm not making many points with Smurfette.

Smurfette:
[Looks at Hefty with an angry face] Aww... for now on, Hefty Smurf, your name is mud!

Gargamel:
I've done it! A Smurf of my very own! No one will ever call me a failure again!

Weepy Smurf:
Everyone think you are a failure? Why, that's horrible! [Crying]

Gargamel:
You... you feel bad for me?

Weepy Smurf:
[Sniffing] Well, of course I do. It must be tough going through life as an incompetent buffoon! [Cries]

Gargamel:
[Approaches Weepy with a knife before reconsidering] Why... ah... yes... [Stuttering] it is...

Gargamel:
[Crying] Believe it or not, no one respect me. Not my fellow wizards, not my mommy, not even Azrael. [Cries out in tears]

Azrael:
[Meowing in confusion]

Weepy Smurf:
Ah you poor wizard you... [Crying]

Hefty Smurf:
I don't believe it. Weeping's still alive.

Gargamel:
You know, I'm sorry I have to eat you, but if I don't, I'll hate myself! [Cries out in tears, then blowing his nose with a handkerchief]

Weepy Smurf:
I know... I know... [Cries out in tears]

Gargamel:
Wa... wa... What am I'm saying? I'm about to taste victory! [Opens the cage where Weepy is kept] Come here, you little blue morsel! I waited a long time for this. Why, I could... [Crackles] weep for joy! [Crackles again]

Hefty Smurf:
[Speaking to Weepy in the Smurf Village] Gee, Weepy, when I thought you were a goner... I... I been so baaad! [Cries out in tears]

Hefty Smurf:
How can such a smart Smurfling be so think-headed when it comes to Gargamel?

Natural 'Nat' Smurf:
[Slouchy's voice is heard from Nat's mouth] Yeah! Every Smurf knows that he is the nastiest, most evil human on the face of the earth.

Gargamel:
[Blushing] Oh my! Look at me! I'm blushing!

Sassette Smurfling:
But I just know that I can change Pappy Gargamel if I had the chance. After all, he must have some good inside of him. He helped to create me, did he?

Gargamel:
Well we all make mistakes! [Jumps in front of the Smurfs]

Smurfs:
Gargamel!

Greedy Smurf:
Hey, you're not supposed to bring strange humans into the village!

Snappy Smurf:
He's not strange. He's our friend Swellfellow.

Hefty Smurf:
Hmm... something familar about this boy.

Gargamel:
Gather around, Smurfs. I brought you a surprise of my own.

Greedy Smurf:
Hmm... something familar with that sack.

Gargamel:
This gift is a real knockout! [Puts his left hand into the sack and then laughs]

Jokey Smurf:
Something familiar with that laugh.

Gargamel:
[Throws magic powder at the Smurfs] Surprise, you miserable Smurfs!

Smurfs:
[Gasps in shock] Gargamel!

Sassette Smurfling:
Nappin' nightowl... [Falls asleep with the other Smurflings]

Sassette Smurfling:
Sunshine and sarsaparilla, isn't anything better than being a Smurf on a hot, summer day?

Gargamel:
[Speaking for a distance] How about eating a Smurf on a hot, summer day! [Runs after the Smurfs from a bush with Azrael running ahead of him]

Gargamel:
[laughs] Sit tight my little bon-bons! Lunch is almost ready!

Papa Smurf:
I'm surprised at you, Gargamel. You should never eat Smurfs for lunch. You should eat Smurfs for dinner.

Smurfs:
[Gasp in shock] Papa Smurf!

Papa Smurf:
And I'm sure with Greedy's help, we could make you a great meal.

Gargamel:
Oh, really?

Papa Smurf:
It's simply a matter of adding the proper seasonings: a pinch of parsley; a little pepper; a dash of salt; perhaps a clove or two all smothered in butter. Of course if you aren't interested in having the meal of a lifetime...

Gargamel:
No, no, no, no! It sounds so good that I can hardly wait! But I will, I will!

Greedy Smurf:
Papa Smurf, do you really think it is smurfy to encourage him like that?

Papa Smurf:
Don't worry, Greedy! I'm only stalling so we have time to come up with a plan.

Greedy Smurf:
Thanks smurfness! Uh... what's the plan?

Papa Smurf:
I'm afraid... uh... that's something I don't even know yet.

Smurfette:
Oh my Smurfs! I can't believe it! All the trees are leaving! [Weeping] Oh... life without trees is kind of be unbearable... [Sniffing]

Gargamel:
There, there, Smurfette. I will be happy to put you out of your misery! [Cackling]

Brain Smurf:
And last, but certainly not least, I like especially to thank my humble assistant and future wizard of the year Brainy Smurf. [Speaks to Smurfette] Well, what do you think of it?

Smurfette:
[Seeings Gargamel from a distance] Oh, this is terrible!

Brain Smurf:
Well, it may need a little work but, ah...

Smurfette:
Not you, Brainy. Gargamel! [Gargamel and Azrael come out of a bush with springs on their feet]

Smurfette:
Curtsy? That's no good! You haven't won anything!

Wartmonger peasant #1:
Yeah, of course we did! Thanks to you, Smurfette, we don't have to bow anymore.

Wartmonger peasant #2:
Whoa! [laughs] Oh, this is fun!

Smurfette:
I don't believe it.

Wartmonger peasant #1:
Neither do we. It's better if slower.

Wartmonger peasant #2:
I agree! I agree!

Smurfette:
Can we rescue the Smurflings now?

Wartmonger peasant #1:
Rescue the Smurflings now?

Wartmonger peasant #2:
Whoa! Sure I wouldn't like that.

Wartmonger peasant #1:
You wouldn't want us to ruin our victory, would you?

Smurfette:
Victory? Why you... you... ah... never mind! I'll rescue the Smurflings myself! [Walks away in disgust]

Smurfette:
Don't worry, Smurflings. At least Nat can tell the crocodiles that we mean them no harm.

Natural 'Nat' Smurf:
Yeah, well, I don't know, Smurfette. I have a little trouble with snakes and frogs, and well, crocodiles...

Smurfette:
Trouble?

Natural 'Nat' Smurf:
Yeeeah! I do great with turtles though.

Smurfette:
[Sees crocodiles] Those aren't turtles, Nat! Help!

Natural 'Nat' Smurf, Slouchy Smurf, Snappy Smurf, Sassette Smurfling:
[Crying out in unison] Help!

Hefty Smurf:
Ah... there's nothing better than a little old-fashion Smurf power.

Gargamel:
Hehehehehe! Is that so?

Gargamel:
[Comes out of hiding with Scruple and Azrael wearing skis] How about an old-fashion Smurf chowder!

Smurfs:
Gargamel!

Natural 'Nat' Smurf:
Wake up, Mr. hedgehog! Ah gee too bad! I thought you might like to ride along with us.

Brainy Smurf:
We have absosmurfly no room aboard for that animal, Nat. If he would to come on board, one of us have to stay behind.

Hefty Smurf:
Well, why didn't you say so, Brainy?

Brainy Smurf:
[Kicked by Hefty off-screen into the forest] And the hedgehog didn't even have a ticket.

Smurfette:
Oh no, my new dress!

Jokey Smurf:
[laughs] That was really funny, Smurfette! [Continues laughing]

Greedy Smurf:
Oh, what a terrible shame!

Smurfette:
Well, at least Greedy understands...

Greedy Smurf:
Oh, yes! It's a terrible shame because that is the last of the porridge. [Licks the porridge that Clumsy Smurf accidentally spilled on Smurfette's dress]

Smurfette:
Oooh, that smurfs it! [Angrily walks away to the dining room's entrance, then speaks to the Smurfs inside] You can all take a lesson in charm from Don Smurfo. [Leaves]

Brainy Smuf:
Hey, Smurfette! Come and join us!

Smurfette:
Sorry, Brainy. I'm just too busy with Don Smurfo.

Brainy Smuf:
Well, what that Smurf got that I don't have?

Sassette Smurfling:
Smurfette.

Natural 'Nat' Smurf:
Will not one of you help me free this poor beast from its suffering? Will not one of you allow yourselves to feel smurf for this poor, injured animal who cries out to you in pain?

Azrael:
[Crying in pain]

Smurfette:
[Crying] Oh boo-hoo! Oh poor Azrael...!

Natural 'Nat' Smurf:
[Speaking in front of the other Smurfs after bringing an injured Azrael into their village] This poor creature is a loving being. Are we Smurfs or not Smurfs?

Azrael:
[Meowing]

Papa Smurf:
Nat, are you all right?

Natural 'Nat' Smurf:
Ah... I guess so, Papa Smurf.

Papa Smurf:
Azrael could have killed you.

Natural 'Nat' Smurf:
Well, I supposed he could, Papa Smurf... but he didn't!

Papa Smurf:
Amazing! [Holds his right hand to his head, then blinks to the television audience]

Clumsy Smurf:
Oh gosh, Handy, you saved my life again! Now, I have to pay you back double.

Handy Smurf:
[Groaning] Noooooo!

Clumsy Smurf:
Handy... you saved my life again! It's like... like some kind of dream.

Handy Smurf:
[Putting his right hand on his brow] More like a nightmare...

Hogatha:
[Enters Gargamel's hovel wearing her wedding dress] Gargy! It's time to make every little witch's wish come true! Hahahaha!

Gargamel:
[Sticks his tough in disgust] Oooh! I wish I were dead!

Smurfette:
Oh, go back to your poster, Bluster. We're just practicing our dancing. [Moving her blond hair seductively]

Bluster:
[Growls in boredom, then looks back to the poster]

Smurfette:
[Speaking to Clumsy] Oh, it's no use, Clumsy. We'll never smurf [get] out of here.

Clumsy Smurf:
Ah, yeah. Not that Bluster sure would be glad to see us go.

Smurfette:
Clumsy, you just gave me an idea.

Clumsy Smurf:
Ah... I, did?

Smurfette:
You know, Clumsy, if we could escape, then Bluster will be the star of the show again.

Bluster:
[Growling in agreement, then looks up to Smurfette]

Smurfette:
But how could two, little, old Smurfs ever escape from this big, old, cage?

Clumsy Smurf:
Oh, yeah! How?

Bluster:
[Growling in agreement]

Smurfette:
Ah... I guess we're stuck, and poor Bluster will never be a star.

Bluster:
[Thinking for a momment and then opening the cage containing Clumsy and Smurfette]

Smurfette:
Oh, Bluster! What a surprise! And we'll never tell, will we, Clumsy?

Clumsy Smurf:
[Confused] Ah... tell what, Smurfette?

Bluster:
[Growling expecting an answer from Smurfette]

Smurfette:
Ah... nevermind, Clumsy. Come on! [Jumps out of the cage. Clumsy follows her by doing the same]

Brainy Smurf:
Get me out of here! Help! [Bangs on the elevator cage with his fists]

Hefty Smurf:
Smurf a grip on yourself, Brainy! We have to wait until some Smurf finds us.

Brainy Smurf:
[Slides his back on the elevator cage and sits down] Ah I'm supposed your right, Hefty. [Reads a book] I might as well make the best of things by reading my latest and greatest quotations of Brainy Smurf. [Hefty looks surprised] Brilliant Quotation #1...

Hefty Smurf:
[Quickly bangs the elevator cage with his fists] Help!

Brainy Smurf:
Brainy Smurf's Brilliant Quotation #3002: Never smurf off tomorrow what Brainy Smurf can help you smurf today.

Hefty Smurf:
[Shakes his head and put his hand on his checks in bewildment] Oh why me!

Brainy Smurf:
Quotation #7034...

Hefty Smurf:
I've... I've... can't smurf it anymore! [Throws a dumbell at a window, breaking it. He leaps out of the elevator cage and graps onto a nearby tree branch]

Brainy Smurf:
Well, if it's that easy, why didn't you smurf us out sooner?

Clumsy Smurf:
Too bad this is Lazy's last party. [His mouth shut by Smurfette's hand]

Lazy Smurf:
"Last party"? What does he mean "last party"?

Smurfette:
Eh... well, he means that...

Brainy Smurf:
Clumsy, you talk too much and too loud just because Papa Smurf said that there was no cure for Lazy and he was going to smurf off in a few days is no reason to blab. And furthermore...

Brainy Smurf:
[Kicked outside the Smurf Village and landing on his head] Leave it to Clumsy to spill the beans!

Smurfette:
[Looking at her reflection in a lake] Oh, I wonder what will my new friend will be like. [Gargamel appears in the water reflection and Smurfette cries out in shock]

Gargamel:
Care to join me for dinner, Smurfette?

Smurfette:
[Avoiding the net swungs by Gargamel and running away from him] Ga... Gargamel!

Gargamel:
Come back here! [Trips on a piece of wood and falls on his back]

Smurfette:
[Running] I wanted to meet a friend, not a fiend!

Clumsy Smurf:
[Floating with Brainy inside Gargamel's stew pot] Ah, gee, Brainy. Why Gargamel's giving us a bath?

Brainy Smurf:
I don't think that what he has that in mind, Clumsy.

Tailor Smurf, Farmer Smurf, Grouchy Smurf, Hefty Smurf, Handy Smurf, Vanity Smurf, Clumsy Smurf, Gargamel, Brainy Smurf, Jokey Smurf:
[singing and dancing on stage] O Smurfette, I will really like to be the one/ Smurf you to the ball will be such fun!/ And be the happiest Smurf on the earth/ If you choose me, me, me for Mr. Smurf!

Gargamel:
[Sticks out his tongue in disgust] Oh I think I'm going to be sick!

Gargamel:
Oh you poor little things! Oh how terrible...! Here, here, I'll save you! [Nets Smurfette and Vanity]

Smurfette:
[Coughs] Ohh... Gargamel! You saved our lives...

Gargamel:
Oh, tut, tut, tut! What are friends for. [Puts Smurfette and Vanity down to the ground. Then looks at the audience] Yuck!

Vanity Smurf:
Bu... but Gargamel, you never were our friend before.

Smurfette:
Yeah, you always be a mean, nasty, wicked, old wizard.

Gargamel:
But I have seen the light, my days of miserable meaness are over. And you know, it feels so much nicer being nice. Eh... ehm, now why don't we all skip along to your village and tell Papa Diamond... eh... Papa Smurf the good news?

Gargamel:
I'm a new man, Papa Smurf.

Papa Smurf:
Fiddlesmurfs!

Gargamel:
Oh, Papa Smurf, have pity! You don't know how lonesome it has been. Always fighting with you nice, little Smurfs and never having any friends! [Crying] [Looks at the audience and pulls a peace sign] Peace, brothers!

Papa Smurf:
Double fiddlesmurfs! [Crying Smurfs in the background]

Poet Smurf:
I call it "The Answer Smurf." Whatever the question, big or small, ask Brainy Smurf, he knows it all! [Giggles] What do you think?

Snappy Smurf:
What do you think Brainy knows the answer?

Poet Smurf:
Because he told me.

Snappy Smurf:
Hmm... I think he [i.e. Poet] needs his poetic license revoked.

Brainy Smurf:
Thank smurfness they're gone!

Slouchy Smurf:
[Taps Brainy's back with his finger] Brainy! [Brainy turns towards Slouchy] I got a few questions to ask you...

Brainy Smurf:
Ohhhh... [Falls to the ground and faints]

Slouchy Smurf:
[Surprised] But that can wait.

Gargamel:
[singing] What a Smurfy thing to be, a Smurf with perfect mem... eh, eh, what am I'm doing? Distant singing. It can only be those disgusting, happy Smurfs. [Removes his ear horn] Good! They stopped! I was beginning to get nausous.

Brainy Smurf:
[Speaking to himself in Papa Smurf's laboratory] If Clumsy is suddenly Brainy, what does that makes me? [Gasps] Gosh... Clumsy... [Runs to leave the laboratory] Wa... wa... wait for me! [Trips and falls near the laboratory's entrance] I guess that answers my question.

Hefty Smurf:
We better wait until Papa Smurf comes back.

Smurfette:
But what if he doesn't come back?

Hefty Smurf:
Then he'll miss the end of the world! [laughs]

Smurfette:
That's not funny, Hefty Smurf. I think we should go back to the village. But if it's the end of the world, I wanted to be surrounded by friends when it happens.

Hefty Smurf:
I understand, Smurfette. But why don't you take Puppy back and I'll wait for Papa Smurf?

Smurfette:
No, you keep Puppy. That way at least, you won't be alone when [Kisses Hefty on his left cheek, then cries]... when... goodbye, Hefty! [Leaves Hefty by jumping off the window stool and crying loudly]

Hefty Smurf:
[Gushes and giggles] The end of the world oughta happen more often! Ah, I'm not afraid to be alone even if... [Puppy barks] And don't go too far, Puppy. [Puppy continues to bark] Puppy, don't leave me! I don't wanna be alone! [Jumps off the window stool]

Painter Smurf:
[Seeing Gargamel disguised as the tooth fairy] D?j? vu! Zhe tooth fairy seems very strange.

Vanity Smurf:
Oh, you're so right. That hairstyle went out years ago.

Gargamel:
[Disguised as the tooth fairy] Gather around, you delicious little... oh, darling little Smurfs.

Sassette Smurfling:
Oh tooth fairy. Do you really have a surprise for me?

Gargamel:
You might say. I have a surprise for everyone. [Removes his wig] Surprise! [Crackles]

Clumsy Smurf:
[Running with Painter and Vanity] Oh, gosh! The tooth fairy looks like... oow... like Gargamel!

Painter Smurf:
This is terrible!

Vanity Smurf:
I'll say. Whoever heard wearing black tights with a blue tutu.

Scruple:
[Pours contents from a vial into a violet bottle] Now, all I need is some bat wings, a lizard tail, and a shark's tooth.

Tooth Fairy:
Excuse me! But if you help me, maybe I can help you.

Scruple:
Yeees! Maybe you can! Instead of bat wings, I think I'll use fairy wings! Hahahaha!

Tooth Fairy:
Oh dear!

Natural 'Nat' Smurf:
Look at these poor, poor animals! Who would do such a mean thing?

Papa Smurf:
I'm afraid that human children don't realize how it feels to be caged, Nat. If we don't find that egg soon, we may all end up like these creatures.

Gargamel:
My revenge will be terrible! You'll see! You'll see!

Brainy Smurf:
Excellent! You captured the fugitive. Let's hurry back to the village so I can deliver the summation of my masterful case!

Smurfette, Snappy Smurf, Sassette Smurfling:
This case is closed!

Brainy Smurf:
[Kicked out into the forest] Ohh... some justice!

Gargamel:
[Opens the wooden Papa Smurf statue while Azrael quickly runs out of it] Guess who's coming for dinner?

Smurfs:
Gargamel! [Grabs Brainy and put him into Gargamel's bag]

Gargamel:
That's right! Who's for dessert?

Hefty Smurf:
Azrael!

Azrael:
[Meows]

Hefty Smurf:
Run! [Runs. Azreal jumps onto the catapult and is catapulted out of the Smurf Village]

Handy Smurf:
Well, that takes care of Azrael.

Hefty Smurf:
Yeah! Now I know why it's called a catapult!

Sassette:
[Speaking while Gargamel plays Woody's cursed pan flute] Pappy Gargamel, I just wanted to tell you that I love you. I don't know why I love you, but I really do.

Gargamel:
[Becomes exhausted and sighs. Then comes to Sassette to plead with her] Oh no one... no one has ever said that to me before... [Weeps] I can't bear it...! [Weeps again]

Papa Smurf:
[Speaking after climbing out of Gargamel's basket] Not even the deep voice of evil within Gargamel is strong enough to withstand the power of love.

Sassette:
[after leaving Gargamel's hovel with the other Smurfs and Laconia the wood elf] Papa Smurf, will Pappy Gargamel stay nice forever?

Papa Smurf:
The effect of the music is not permanent. The only way Gargamel can change forever is if he really wants to. But even if he doesn't change, he'll never forget what happened to him.

Sassette Smurfling:
Money? What's money?

Brainy Smurf:
Well Sassette, according to humans, money is what makes the world go round. A lack of money is the root of all evil, money talks...

Grandpa Smurf:
Money talks too much if you ask me.

Papa Smurf:
Smurfette, stop sniffling.

Smurfette:
But poor Sassette... Oh I have been so selfish... I'll never forgive myself...! [Sniffling]

Papa Smurf:
[sighs] Try...