The Addams Family

[referring to their house]

Morticia:
It’s hideous.

Gomez:
It’s horrible.

Morticia and Gomez:
It’s home!

Wednesday:
Hello.

[referring to the red balloon Wednesday is holding in her hand]

Morticia:
Wednesday, what do you have there?

Wednesday:
I’m not sure.

Morticia:
Strange. There’s usually a murderous clown attached to the other end of these.

Morticia:
Don’t forget to kick your father goodnight.

Wednesday:
Yes, mother.

Gomez:
Pugsley, blow F6. Fire in the hole!

[the side of the house explodes, Uncle Fester falls through the ceiling in his bathtub]

Pugsley:
Yes!

Uncle Fester:
You sunk my battleship!

Gomez:
Well done, Pugsley.

[referring to the frog they have to dissect in their biology class]

Parker:
Yuk!

Wednesday:
I’ve done this thousands of times.

[as Wednesday tries to bring their frog back to life using electricity, like Frankenstein]

Wednesday:
Give my creature life! Live! I tell you, live!

[as their frog gets electrocuted back to life, the the other frogs also come to life, wreaking havoc in the class]

Parker:
Totally awesome.

Gomez:
[to Mortecia, who is tightening his head inside some sort of torture device] Darling, is that really as tight as you can make it?

Gomez:
These dungs are all the same. Let’s show them what it means to be an Addams.

Gomez:
[after Cousin Itt arrives in a swanky vehicle] Cousin, you made it!

Morticia:
[as Pugsley is drinking from a dog’s water bowl] Pugsley, don’t drink it all. This gentleman wants some too. [the man screams and runs off in fear] What a nervous man.

Morticia:
[as she opens the window to a black sky with thunder and lightning] What a lovely morning!

Wednesday:
[as they arrive in a clean looking suburb] It’s all so different.

Wednesday:
I wish something would liven this already tedious day. [the tree branch that Pugsley is hanging upside down on throws him aside] Thanks for trying, Ichabod.

Margaux:
[referring to the Addams family] These people are monsters! They’ll ruin the neighborhood.