The Ice Pirates

Jason:
[being ushered away from the sleeping princess by his companions] Whatever happened to "we rape, we pillage"?

Jason:
[looking at the robot that Roscoe has built] Why'd you make him black?

Roscoe:
[smiling] Because I wanted him to be perfect.

Zeno:
I hope no one minds but I have no intention of facing this sober.

Supreme Commander:
Even their robots are insolent.

Maida:
[after killing Patch's assistant] I think you owe the lady and me an apology

Patch:
[smiles] My apologies.

Maida:
[slices off his eye patch] You didn't sound to sincere to me.

Patch:
I'm sorry.

Parrot:
Don't believe him. He's lying.

Princess Karina:
How long have you known about this?

Jason:
First we've heard of it.

Roscoe:
Couple of days.

[Jason and Roscoe look at each other]

Jason:
Couple of days.

Roscoe:
First we've heard of it.

Wendon:
People without water will do anything!

Wendon:
Do I have value again?

Killjoy:
They don't castrate clergy. Just in case.

Roscoe:
Just in case of what?

Killjoy:
Just in case there really is a god.

[watching an excerpt from Rollerball on TV]

Nanny:
That's barbaric!

Killjoy:
Oh, yeah!

Jason:
The manifest

Roscoe:
Box B-28

Jason:
28?... 25, 26, 27... B28... oh no [hands egg to Roscoe]

Roscoe:
What is it?

Jason:
Space Herpe.

Roscoe:
herpe?

Jason:
Dormant form. uh - Keep away from heat and - uh - moisture. Extremely dangerous when activated. Antibody - oh boy - unknown.

Princess Karina:
Your he is a she and she thinks you're wonderful.

Jason:
She does?

Princess Karina:
I think you better get over there and see what you can do, Jason.

Jason:
No Way.

Princess Karina:
No Water then.

Jason:
You wouldn't.

Princess Karina:
Try me.

Blonde Girl:
Jason, you never keep any of your promises.

Jason:
Oh really, well I will... next time.

Blonde Girl:
Promise?

Percy the Robot:
[glancing at robots loading onto the ship] What rif-raf.

Maida:
It says here that the water planet has so much moisture on its surface that it continuously creates cycles of clouds and falling rain.

Killjoy:
Sure. You know what that means. That means that we will both be able to take hot wet baths together.

Jason:
It's really not that dangerous.

Princess Karina:
That's not what I've been told.

Jason:
I don't mean anything by this but is there any particularly reason that he is black.

Roscoe:
[smiling] Sure, I wanted him to be perfect.

Wendon:
I'm afraid I have some bad news... well maybe its not that bad. The princess is pregnant.

Jason:
Pregnant? How'd the hell that happen?

Wendon:
Well you can be sure I had nothing to do with it. She's asking to see you.

Princess Karina:
Jason?

Jason:
Yeah, what's going on?

Princess Karina:
[sarcastically] Big surprise. Daddy. [holding up baby for Jason to see]

Killjoy:
I was cuttin' 'em to pieces 10 minutes ago. [sighs then dies]

Elderly Jason:
Oh no, not him again. [as Zorn enters the ice storage area]

Zorn:
You are finished. The seventh world is mine.

Elderly Jason:
Come on, Roscoe. You're looking bad.

Roscoe:
You don't look to good yourself.

Elderly Jason:
They're gaining on us. Well, I guess this is it.

Jason:
Here I come, dad!

Elderly Jason:
Beat it, Roscoe!

Old Karina:
Jason, Jason! It's him, it's... it's him. That's our baby!

Elderly Jason:
That is him!

Old Karina:
Isn't he beautiful!

Jason:
Mom. Dad. We won!

Elderly Jason:
He's a chip off the old block.

Zorn:
I always hated kids.