Get Smart2008

Maxwell Smart:
I have obtained a snippet, at great risk to a bus boy in Balad.

[Men start speaking in Punjab on a recording which Max is translating]

Maxwell Smart:
"Aftab, how is your coffee?"

Maxwell Smart:
"Good, Dalip, it's decaf. How is yours?"

Maxwell Smart:
"It is good, also. How is your muffin?"

Maxwell Smart:
Powerful stuff

The Chief:
So "muffin", then, is a code word?

Maxwell Smart:
No, it is comfort food... and quite frankly much more fattening than most people realize. Which begs the question... why would two hardened KAOS agents... risk the carbs?

Maxwell Smart:
Because they are under a great deal of stress.

Agent 23:
Hence the decaf.

Maxwell Smart:
For Aftab yes. Dalip takes his full-strength. Why? Because he has been sleeping on the couch for three days... because he called his sister-in-law a "leathery hag".

Larabee:
You know, people often say things in anger they don't really mean. Leathery hag, fat cow, ungrateful whore. Just words really, that shouldn't be used against you in a custody hearing.

Agent 91:
Let it go, man, those kids don't even look like you.

The Chief:
Can we put a pen in this, please... and go back to Max's extraordinary detailed report?

Maxwell Smart:
Thank you, Chief. All I'm saying is... that until we understand that our enemies are also human beings... we will never defeat them. Yes, they are bad guys, but that is what they do, not who they are. Let's continue listening... and bear in mind that the next 100 pages can get a little bit dry.

Larabee:
Come on.

[All sigh in boredom]