Snitch1998

Jackie O'Hara:
So... Teddy f***in' Timmons, huh? I heard you were back.

Teddy:
Yeah.

Jackie O'Hara:
You don't call me!

Teddy:
Well, no, you see, Jackie, I-I just got back...

Jackie O'Hara:
-What are you boys drinkin'? Hey, Shang, get a round in here will you?

Shang:
[calls out] Sure, Jack.

Jackie O'Hara:
F***in' Celtics, huh?

Teddy:
I-I-I g-guess you've been hearin' stories about me, huh, Jackie?

Jackie O'Hara:
I heard you was back was all.

Teddy:
Well, let me tell ya. This is f***in' hilarious, you're gunna piss your pants. Remember that Perez, that f***in' spic from Dorchester? Remember him?

Jackie O'Hara:
What, the little guy?

Teddy:
R-remember you sent me and Gavin down to talk to him? Gavvy, you remember that?

Gavin:
[nods] Sure, I remember that.

Teddy:
So about a month ago these F.B.I. guys come to talk to me in the joint. And, I don't even talk to regular cops, ever, you know? Like when they came to me after I got busted for all that coke... And they said 'Jackie O' and I said 'I know the guy, but I don't work for anyone'.

Jackie O'Hara:
Hey, thanks for that by the way.

Teddy:
That's no problem, Jackie. So, these F.B.I. guys want to know about Perez 'cause they're building a case against him, right? You're going to love this. I say, 'You mean Junior Perez of Columbia Avenue in Dorchester, about five-two, got a fat-assed girlfriend that looks like a f***in' pitbull?' They said yeah, and I said 'No, never heard of the guy'. [everyone laughs] Right? So now they roll up their sleeves. They're not going nowhere. And I sit there for three hours, f***in' sweatin', shakin'. I almost start cryin'. It's like f***in' Academy Award time. Finally I break down. And you know, I tell 'em the truth. I-I'm like George f***in' Washington, I cannot tell a lie. 'I know Perez, and I used to work for him.'. I-I give 'em Perez, that fat f***in' Columbian prick Menendez, locations, everything. And then they come back to me, and they want me to testify. It's like Witness Protection bullshit, and i'm like, 'F*** you. I'm not going into any Witness Protection bullshit f***in' plan. F*** that! We made a deal!'. So now this lawyer they gave me is all over 'em. I'm not even safe in the joint with the witness protection and sh*t, and they got no choice! They gotta let me go.

Jackie O'Hara:
[pause, everyone looks at each other] F***! Can you believe that? F***!

Teddy:
Yeah, I tell ya it was a f***in' nightmare. Never trust those Feds, man, they f***in' lie. I'm lucky to be here.

Jackie O'Hara:
Yeah, f***in' Feds. Cocksuckers, huh?

Red:
Pricks.

Jackie O'Hara:
They're in Boston looking for Puerto Ricans. In Washington they're stealing us blind!

Red:
Absolutely right.

Jackie O'Hara:
Hey, here's to Teddy. [raises glass] Welcome home! [all toasting, shouting] When the cops gonna learn, huh? This town don't talk. Especially this kid right here. [points and playfully slaps Seamus] A f***in' chatterbox, the gift of gab, huh? [everyone laughs] Hey guys I gotta go. Katy's mother's cookin' dinner. Anyone got any rolaids? [laughing]

Teddy:
Hey, hey, Jackie, uh, we're cool, right?

Jackie O'Hara:
Sure, sure, hey. Give me a call on the weekend. We got some work.