The Canterville Ghost1986

Sir Simon de Canterville:
[Sir Simon has returned to his study on the top floor of the castle after scaring Lucy & Harry in their bedroom, and Jenny has followed him. Sir Simon is sitting at his desk, writing and talking to his stuffed parrot, Geoffrey] . Geoffrey, I shall soon make short work of these brazen, impudent upstarts!

Jennifer Canterville:
Excuse me, sir?

Sir Simon de Canterville:
[Sir Simon looks up to Geoffrey, thinking the talking came from the parrot] . Geoffrey! [he hits the parrot with his feather quill, which produces a small dust cloud]

Jennifer Canterville:
M... May I speak with you? Please?

Sir Simon de Canterville:
[Sir Simon, realizing someone is behind him, turns to look at the girl. He becomes enraged at the intrusion into his chambers and manifests himself as a large head, reaching out to grab Jennfier] AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!

Jennifer Canterville:
[Jennifer slowly backs up in fear, but never takes her eyes off the apparation]

Sir Simon de Canterville:
[still holding out a ghostly hand] Are you frightened? [Jenny nods, wide-eyed] Yes? Good. BE GONE! [his voice echoes loudly]

Jennifer Canterville:
[Jenny continues to stand there, hardly believing she is talking to a real ghost] I knew you were a real ghost, even when Lucy didn't. And I think what you're doing is very good. You see, Lucy's my stepmother. My real mom died, 4 years ago. My dad's so sweet that... I know that I shouldn't feel this way, but... I can't help it. So, if you can... you know, sort of... scare her off? I'd really appreciate it! I think you're doing a great job so far! Thank you very much.

Sir Simon de Canterville:
[Sir Simon shakes his head and rematerializes into his normal form, sitting down at his desk, dumbfounded that the child is not afraid. He stares at Jenny] Why, aren't you afraid of me?

Jennifer Canterville:
I don't know.

Sir Simon de Canterville:
I've never been so grossly insulted! I've frightened thousands of people into fits of hysterics merely by grinning at them! Poor old Madame Lathruniac was confined to her bed for 6 weeks from an attack of brain fever!... when she awoke early one morning and saw me seated in the armchair by the fire... reading her diary. Her butler, shot himself, when he saw my green [flexes his fingers] fingers tapping on the pantry window! And Lady Stockfield, a great beauty, was arised always to wear a black velvet band 'round her throat, to hide the marks of my five fingers burnt upon her skin! And you do not fear me?

Jennifer Canterville:
[she smiles and shakes her head] . No.

Sir Simon de Canterville:
[shakes his head and raises his finger for emphasis] One peal of my demonic laughter, is set to have turned Lord Drake's weak grain in a single night! Listen! [Sir Simon bellows ghostly, demonic laughter which reverberates through the castle]

Jennifer Canterville:
That is wonderful!

Sir Simon de Canterville:
I can't believe it! [turns around hastily and waves an arm back] Go away! Go back to wherever you came from!

Jennifer Canterville:
We can't, we sold our house in Cleveland, this is where we live now!

Sir Simon de Canterville:
[turns back] Leave me!

Jennifer Canterville:
Ok, I'm going. You have to go to b... bed?

Sir Simon de Canterville:
Of course, you can sleep. You have merely to climb into bed and blow out the candle. But I haven't slept for 300 years! [yawns] And I'm so tired! [stifles another yawn]

Jennifer Canterville:
Why can't you sleep?

Sir Simon de Canterville:
[takes his hand away] Look around this chamber.

Jennifer Canterville:
[surveys the room] Well, you know, it wouldn't be so bad if you cleaned it up. All you really need are... some pictures. [wraps her arms around her and shivers, drawing her robe closed] Oohh. A heater, you definitely need a heater. TV would be nice. Let's see, what else? Bed. There's no bed.

Sir Simon de Canterville:
There hasn't been one for 300 years.

Jennifer Canterville:
No wonder you haven't slept.

Sir Simon de Canterville:
You don't understand. I long to sleep, and cannot. Not since that terrible day. If I could ever once lie down, if I could at last take my place in the soft brown earth, with the grasses waving above my head, and listen to silence, to finally have no yesterday, no tomorrow, to forget time, to forgive life, to be at peace my soul freed for death... if only there could be an end, to the endless.