Before Midnight2013

Céline:
Very few people realize what it is like for an active or passionate woman to have a child. Some friends told me, "you'll see, you'll want to throw them out the window." Okay, but the truth is I never wanted to hurt them once but I thought about ending it all for myself a hundred times. I was so confused, and you were always away on a stupid book tour or because of Henry's custody sh*t and I didn't want to be a burden. Now I know why Sylvia Plath put her head in a toaster.

Jesse:
It was an oven.

Céline:
Don't play with words. You know what I mean - toaster, oven. Same thing. You know how many times I was alone with the girls crying with no clue what to do? Do you know the guilt a mother feels when she doesn't know what to do?

Jesse:
Do you think you have sole ownership of that feeling?

Céline:
I don't think you understand, okay? You know what my secret fear is? With every man? Is that they all want to turn me into a submissive housewife.

Jesse:
Okay, no one could ever do that, all right? I promise, it would be easier to fit your head into a toaster than to turn you into anything submissive.

Céline:
I don't think I've recovered since giving birth. When they were born, I had no idea what to do. People expect women to have instinct that kicks in, like a female baboon. But I had no idea how to do anything. I loved them so much, and I was doing everything wrong. And you were away so often, calling me, asking me how my day went, and I couldn't even say it to you because I felt so ashamed for being so clueless.

Jesse:
Look, I think you did great.

Céline:
No, I didn't.

Jesse:
No, you did. Well, you did a good job faking it, then.

Céline:
I remember the only way I could get them to sleep was to drag that stupid double stroller down the stairs and walk them for hours and hours in the middle of the night, all the way to Pigalle and back. I almost got mugged once... I mean, the only reason why the guy didn't attack me was is that I looked so pathetic. The only upside of being over 35 is that you don't get raped as much. I read it - its true.