As Good as It Gets1997

Carol Connelly:
So, anything else?

Melvin Udall:
Yeah. I'm gonna give my queer neighbor a lift to Baltimore.

Carol Connelly:
Okay.

Melvin Udall:
Hey. What I did for you, it's, uh, working out?

[There is a breath.]

Carol Connelly:
What you did changed my life.

[She offers him the thank you note.]

Melvin Udall:
No, uh . . . no - no thank you note.

Carol Connelly:
Well, part of what I said in this entire history of my life, which you won't read, is that somehow, you have done more for my mother, my son, and me, than anyone else ever has, and . . .

[She opens up the letter and looks for a page.]

Carol Connelly:
. . . I'm just gonna read you this part of it. "And that makes you the most important, surprising, generous person I ever met in my life and that you're gonna be in our prayers, our daily prayers, forever."

Melvin Udall:
Lovely.

Carol Connelly:
I . . . I also wrote one part . . . I'm just gonna say I - I wrote I'm sorry. I . . . I was talking about I was sorry when I - when I got mad at you for - for when you came over, and you told my . . .

Melvin Udall:
Uh-huh.

Carol Connelly:
. . . son that he ought to answer back so I wrote that I was sorry about that.

[Melvin is wildly uncomfortable and wants to disappear, but Carol is getting into it, being emotionally moved by her own words.]

Carol Connelly:
And then I . . . I wrote I was sorry for busting you on that, and I'm sorry for busting in on you that night . . . when I said I was never . . . I was sorry, and I'm sorry for every time your food was cold and that you had to wait two seconds for a coffee filler, and I'm sorry for never spotting, right there at the table in the restaurant, the human being that had it in him to do this thing for us. I'll just - you know what? I'm just gonna start from the beginning. "I have not been able to express my gratefulness to you even as I look at the word 'grateful' now, it doesn't begin to tell you what I feel . . ."

[She finally notes Melvin's mood and pauses.]

Melvin Udall:
Uh, that's, uh, nice of you. Thank you.

Carol Connelly:
Thank you.

Melvin Udall:
Now, I want you to do something for me.

[Carol looks at Melvin for a very strange, long beat.]

Carol Connelly:
I'm sorry. Didn't I say, "What?" I thought I said, "What?" . . . What?

Melvin Udall:
I want you to go on this trip.

[Carol laughs.]

Carol Connelly:
No, sir.

Melvin Udall:
I can't do this without you. I'm afraid he might pull the stiff one eye on me. I need you to chaperone. Separate everything but cars. You said you like convertibles. Now, I'm on the hook.

Carol Connelly:
I'm sorry. "The stiff one eye"?

Melvin Udall:
Two days.

Carol Connelly:
I can't. I work.

Melvin Udall:
You get off when you want to.

Carol Connelly:
My son.

Melvin Udall:
Bettes said he's doing fine.

Carol Connelly:
Melvin, I'd rather not.

Melvin Udall:
What has that got to do with it?

Carol Connelly:
Funny, I thought it was a strong point.

Melvin Udall:
Write a note. Ain't she sweet? I need a hand, and where'd she go.

Carol Connelly:
Are you saying accepting your help obligates me?

Melvin Udall:
Is there any other way to see it?

Carol Connelly:
No.