Lincoln2012

Abraham Lincoln:
Well, Mr. Representative Ashley! Tell us the news from the Hill.

James Ashley:
Ah! Well, news...

Abraham Lincoln:
Why for instance is this thus, and what is the reason for this thusness?

William Seward:
James, we want you to bring the anti-slavery amendment to the floor for debate...

James Ashley:
Excuse me? What?

William Seward:
...immediately, and... you are the amendment's manager, are you not?

James Ashley:
I am, of course, but... immediately?

William Seward:
And we're counting on robust radical support, so tell Mr. Stevens we expect him to put his back into it, it's not going to be easy, but we trust...

James Ashley:
It's impossible. No, I am sorry, no, we can't organize anything immediately in the House. I have been canvassing the Democrats since the election, in case any of them softened after they got walloped. But they have stiffened if anything, Mr. Secretary. There aren't nearly enough votes—

Abraham Lincoln:
We're whalers, Mr. Ashley!

James Ashley:
Whalers? As in, uh, whales?

Abraham Lincoln:
We've been chasing this whale for a long time. We've finally placed a harpoon in the monster's back. It's in, James, it's in! We finish the deed now, we can't wait! Or with one flop of his tail, [slaps Ashley's shoulder] he'll smash the boat and send us all to eternity!

William Seward:
On the 31st of this month, of this year, put the amendment up for a vote.