Johnny English2003

Pegasus:
It's an unmitigated disaster, English!

Johnny English:
I couldn't agree more, sir.

Pegasus:
Well, we need to get those jewels back, English, and fast! [English is momentarily distracted by the sight of Pegasus's secretary (who he accidentally tranquilized earlier) scooting past the doors outside in a wheelchair, glaring at him] Now tell me about this assailant. Because when they searched the room later, there was no sign of him.

Johnny English:
[Uncomfortable; the 'assailant' was made up by him to account for him accidentally knocking a man out] Well, the man was clearly a professional. He must have escaped while the Queen was being sedated.

Pegasus:
But he's the only lead we've got, English! We have to find him. [A man with a laptop walks into the room] Oh, come in. This is-this is Roger from Data Support. He'll produce a likeness based on your description. So tell us, what did this man look like?

Johnny English:
Well, he was... big.

Roger:
Hair colour?

Johnny English:
[looks around the room for ideas and spots a fruitbowl] Umm... orange.

Pegasus:
[skeptical] Orange?

Johnny English:
Mmh. And curly. Well, frizzy, actually. Frizzy sort of thing.

Roger [writing down into his laptop] Frizzy.

Johnny English:
An eye patch, broken nose, very few teeth. Two, I would say at the most. And a scar on his cheek... in the shape... of a banana.

Roger:
Which cheek?

Johnny English:
Both cheeks. They sort of met in the middle.

Pegasus:
Are you sure about this, English?

[Pegasus shows him the likeness, accompanied with a scare chord:
it resembles a cross between a toothless pirate and a clown]

Johnny English:
[surprised by made-up appearance] AH! Oh, that's him, sir. An uncanny resemblance. Why, it's just as if he's in the room with us.