Pinocchio1940

[Pinocchio and Jiminy are walking home after escaping from Stromboli]

Pinocchio:
No, sir. Nothing can stop me now! I'll make good this time!

Jiminy:
You'd better!

Pinocchio:
I will. I'm going to school!

Jiminy:
That's the stuff, Pinoke!

Pinocchio:
I'd rather be smart than be an actor!

Jiminy:
Now, you're talkin'! C'mon, slowpoke! I'll race you home!

[they race back to Geppetto's workshop until Honest John grabs Pinocchio by the back of his loincloth with his cane. Gideon still holds the back of Pinocchio's loincloth with Honest John's cane as Honest John runs in place alongside Pinocchio]

Honest John:
Well, well, Pinocchio! What's your rush?

Pinocchio:
I gotta beat Jiminy home. [tips his hat] Oh, hello.

Honest John:
Well, how was the great actor?

Pinocchio:
I don't wanna be an actor. Stromboli was terrible!

Honest John:
He was?

Pinocchio:
[Gideon hold still Pinocchio's loincloth with his cane] Yeah! He locked me in a birdcage!

Honest John:
He did?

Pinocchio:
Uh-huh, and I learned my lesson. I'm goin' ho--

Honest John:
Oh, you poor, poor boy! You must be a nervous wreck. That's it! You are a nervous wreck! We must diagnose this case at once! Quick, doctor! Your notebook! [Gideon pulls out a notepad and a pencil] Bless my soul. [looks at Pinocchio's arm to check his pulse] Mmm.... mm-hmm! [measures Pinocchio's pulse with a ruler] My, my.... Just as I thought. A slight touch of nolitary complications with bucolic semi-lunar contraptions of the flying trapezes. [Gideon writes down what he thinks he said; Honest John uses his glasses as a tongue depressor while he looks into Pinocchio's mouth] Mm-hmm.... say "hippopotamus".

Pinocchio:
Hi-ho-hotamus!

Honest John:
I knew it! Compound transmission in the pandemonium custom in the span frantic disintegration. [Gideon writes in the middle of the air] Close your eyes. [Pinocchio closes his eyes hard] What do you see?

Pinocchio:
Nothing.

Honest John:
[holds a spotted handkerchief in front of Pinocchio] Open them up. [Pinocchio does so] Now, what do you see?

Pinocchio:
Spots.

Honest John:
Aha! Now, that heart! [Peels up Pinocchio's shirt untucked, puts his ear to his belly and listens for his heartbeat, and makes a jazzy drumming solo on some bottles with his cane. Gideon dances while writing down the information] Ooh, my goodness! A palpitating syncopation of the killer-diller with a wicky-wacky stabbing of the floy joy! [bonks Gideon's head with his cane] Quick, doctor! That report! [Takes the notepad from a dizzy Gideon and looks at what he wrote, which was nothing but scribbles] Oh! This makes it perfectly clear! My boy, you are allergic!

Pinocchio:
Allergic?

Honest John:
Yes, and there is only one cure! A vacation! On Pleasure Island! [winks at Gideon]

Pinocchio:
Pleasure Island?

Honest John:
Yes! That happy land of carefree boys where everyday's a holiday!

Pinocchio:
But I can't go. I--

Honest John:
Why, of course you can go! I'm giving you my ticket! [produces a playing card as a "ticket" in his hand and gives it to Pinocchio] Here.

Pinocchio:
[takes the "ticket"] Thanks, but I'm goi...

Honest John:
Oh, tut, tut, tut! I insist! Your health comes first! Come! The coach departs at midnight! [He and Gideon take Pinocchio to the coach to Pleasure Island, singing] Hi diddle dee-dee! It's Pleasure Isle for me! Where every day is a holiday and kids have nothing to do but play. Hi diddle dee-doo! If what I hear is true. A land of pudding and marmalade. It's Pleasure Isle for me!

Jiminy:
Pinoke! Oh, Pinoke! Now where do you suppose that he-- [Turns around to see Pinocchio, Honest John, and Gideon disappear around the corner, and runs after them] Huh? Pinocchio! Hey! Come back here!