Muppets From Space1999

Dr. Van Neuter:
Let's see here... Have you ever experienced any achiness in your tentacles?

Gonzo:
I don't have tentacles!

Dr. Van Neuter:
Good, no achy tentacles, good... Head ever come off?

Gonzo:
No, I don't think so.

Dr. Van Neuter:
Good, good, good. Any gingivitis?

Gonzo:
No.

Dr. Van Neuter:
Great. What about problems with that beaky thing you've got there? Itching, swelling, flaking?

Gonzo:
Well, some flaking a couple years ago-

Dr. Van Neuter:
[throws away clipboard] Oh, who cares? It's showtime! Here we go.

Gonzo:
Oh, brother.

Dr. Van Neuter:
Excellent, excellent.

Gonzo:
What's that thing?

Dr. Van Neuter:
I don't know. Here we go. Here we go. Just stay like that.

Gonzo:
Okay.

Pepe:
This way.

Miss Piggy:
Whose bright idea was this, anyway?

Fozzie:
Which way, Kermit?

Pepe:
Kermin! Kermin! This way.

Miss Piggy:
I can't breathe!

Pepe:
Come on, Kermin!

Dr. Van Neuter:
Okay. Here we go.

Gonzo:
Wait, wait.

Dr. Van Neuter:
What is it?

Gonzo:
Are you sure this is covered by my HMO?

Dr. Van Neuter:
Good question. I'll check.

Rizzo:
Gonzo.

Gonzo:
Rizzo. You're alive. Where have you been?

Rizzo:
You don't want to know. Sit tight while I chew through these straps.

Gonzo:
Yeah, yeah.

Rizzo:
Okay.

Dr. Van Neuter:
Good news. You're covered with a $10 co-pay. Okay, hold still. And remember, if you experience any unpleasantness, please let me know. I'd hate to miss it.

Rizzo:
Do you mind?

Dr. Van Neuter:
Excuse me. Wait! Oh, good Lord! A rat! I hate rats!

Bubba:
Then today ain't your lucky day, Doc.

Rat #1:
Ready for an operation?

Rat #2:
A little experiment.

Pepe:
Forward, Piggy. Forward.

Kermit:
Doctor.

Pepe:
Doctor.

Kermit:
Doctor.

Pepe:
Doctor.

Kermit:
Just a couple of doctors.

Pepe:
Doctors in the hallway. That was close.

Kermit:
To the right, Fozzie.

Pepe:
Forward, Piggy. Too fast, too fast. The door. Stop!

Kermit:
What in the world?

Singer:
This is big, general. I think we should notify the president.

General Luft:
I'll be the judge of that.

Singer:
As always, sir.

Dr. Van Neuter:
No, don't tickle me!

Pepe:
What do we do?

Miss Piggy:
Will you please get me out of here?

Dr. Van Neuter:
No, no, no! I can't breathe!

Gonzo:
Hey, guys. Quick, get me out of here!

Singer:
Today, sir... ...we must think with a big mind. Behold. Irrefutable evidence of extraterrestrial life.

Dr. Van Neuter:
Release me...

Singer:
This looks worse than it is, general. Obviously, the...

Dr. Van Neuter:
Get off of me, you vermin!

Singer:
The alien is loose in the building. But not to worry, because...

General Luft:
Don't bother. You're terminated.

Singer:
When you say "terminated"...

General Luft:
YOU NEED HELP, SINGER! FIND SOME!

Agent Rentro:
Well, how'd that go for you, then? Okay?