Assy McGee2006

Chief:
What the hell is going on, Assy? You don't look right.

Assy McGee:
It pains me to think about my childhood.

Chief:
What the hell are you talking about?

Assy McGee:
I'm Cuban, Chief. My family, we came here on rafts.

Chief:
What a bunch of horsesh*t.

Assy McGee:
In cuba, there are only two ways out for a child terrorist or soccer player. Soccer was my only way out.

Chief:
Listen, Assy --

Assy McGee:
Or music.

Chief:
Fine.

Assy McGee:
Chess was also a way out.

Chief:
I get it.

Assy McGee:
We weren't even escaping. Just relaxing at the beach. Got caught in a riptide.

Chief:
Enough! Now, knock off the shenanigans and stop this assassination. Do I make myself clear?!

Assy McGee:
...As a cowbell, sir.