Ed, Edd n Eddy's Big Picture Show2009

[May picks herself up off the ground. Jimmy peeks out and sees Lee pin an undershirt to the wire]

May:
If you guys weren't such fashion hogs, there wouldn't be all this laundry to do! [She pulls Jimmy out from the pile]

Jimmy:
Oh, please! Don't hurt me!

May:
Looks like someone left something in their pocket!

Lee:
What is it?

Marie:
Looks like it's whats-his-face!

May:
Let's call him Dutch.

Lee:
[leering] A little far from home, aren't ya, Dutch?

May:
Uh-oh, looks like Dutch needs a diaper!

Jimmy:
[worried] I'm fine, really, I am!

May:
Aw, he's squirming!

[May pins him up and proceeds to nurse him with a bottle of ketchup. Lee steals Jimmy away]

Lee:
Dutch ain't a baby. [She throws Jimmy down] He's a big grown man. [sinister] I bet he wants a date. [paused, after a few moments] WHERE'S MY FLOWERS DUTCH?!?!? [She giggles as Jimmy lies on the ground, twitching]

Marie:
[picking him up] Aw, my man doesn't need to give me any flowers. [She drops him by the washing machine] He just needs to do my laundry. Knock yourself out, Dutch.

May:
[grabbing Jimmy] Babies don't do laundry!

Lee:
He's mine! [She grabs Jimmy's arm] Gimme my man.

Marie:
[taking Jimmy's other leg] Laundry boy's all mine, ladies.

Lee:
Back off Marie.

May:
Baby's mine!

[The three tug at Jimmy, stretching his body]

Jimmy:
I'm getting stretch marks! [Jimmy's pants split, revealing his teddy bear underwear] Stop! I just wanted to see Ed, Edd n Eddy get clobbered!

[The Kankers abruptly let go]

Lee:
[menacing] What did you say about our boyfriends?

Sarah:
None of your beeswax!

[The Kankers turn to the fiery-headed newcomer. Sarah sets her basket down and seethes with rage. Tears of gratitude fill Jimmy's eyes]

Jimmy:
My hero.

[The Kankers jump his hero]

Jimmy:
Leave her alone!

Sarah:
Ah ah AAAAHH!!!

Jimmy:
What'd she ever do to you? [Marie pins Sarah to the ground]

Sarah:
Get off me, lemme go!

[Marie giggles. May grabs Sarah's head and holds it in place]

Lee:
So none of our beeswax, huh? What a shame.

[Lee opens her mouth and sticks her finger in. When it comes out, it is covered with spit. May giggles in anticipation, and her sisters join in. May then turns Sarah's head on its side, and Lee holds her finger above Sarah. Spittle drips onto Sarah's cheek until Lee jams her finger into Sarah's ear, swishing it around in a Wet Willy]

Sarah:
Ew that's so gross!

Jimmy:
A Wet Willy! Oh, the horror!

Marie:
[as Lee works her finger] "So tell us, twerp...

May:
...what do you and Dutch know about our boyfriends!

Jimmy:
Stop! Enough! [The torture stops as Jimmy comes running up] The Eds did something really bad! Something big happened because everyone's angry, chasing after them to give them their just desserts! [crying] Ahhaha, I'm such a snitch!

May:
Did you hear what Dutch said?

Marie:
[angry] Ain't nobody beating up on my man but me!

Lee:
Grab the two squirts, girls. We're gonna need em.

[Sarah and Jimmy look at each other, worry in their eyes]