The Rugrats Movie1998

[Cut to black, then fade to the exterior of the Pickles' house at night. Dil cries. Caption:
"Four O'Clock In the Morning"]

Stu Pickles:
[exhausted] Oh, for the love of Pete. What do you want from us? What? What? [lays on the floor with Dil]

[An American flag is waving on the TV. Didi looks in the Lipschitz book]

Didi Pickles:
Oh, there must be something in here we missed. Somewhere, somehow, something!

Stu Pickles:
There must be. Let me see here! [grabs the book from Didi and looks inside] Cats, colic, Creole baby food. Uh, oh yeah, here it is. Crying... [we skim the text of the book as he reads it. After the second "infant", we cut to his blood-shot eyes, then to an exhausted him and Didi on the couch] Although a baby's crying signifies a disruption in the infant-parent matrix, the good-enough parent pacifies the infant during this period of primary narcissism, foregoing their own needs, sublim-, sublimating, sublimating all their own needs too.

[Stu and Didi fall asleep. Dil stops crying, only to see a giant Dr. Lipschitz rotating up from behind the couch. Two babies, with books for wings, fly off of the doctor, as he is lit up. He starts to sing]

Dr. Lipschitz:
[singing] Raising a baby is a serious venture. [Stu and Didi "wake up"; one of the winged babies take away the Lipschitz book, while the other baby picks up Dil and takes him away] Not to be embarked upon by the faint of heart. [plops dunce caps on Stu and Didi] Parents must make choices that are perfect and wise, / For you're doing something wrong when the baby cries. [a book on top of a pile of books opens, and he picks up the couple and drops them into some sort of netherworld. In that world, Stu and Didi races up a "staircase" of books] You must consider, the psychology of an infant, [Stu and Didi then appear as small babies - Stu in diapers, and Didi all wrapped up, sucking on a pacifier] Nature vs. Nurture, / Feed the ego; starve the mind. [Twin Lipschitzes appear on either side of the crib. They embrace each other, then turn into a Rorschach print, which he holds, while sitting in a chair] You must anticipate each crisis sure to arise, / For you're doing something wrong when the baby cries. [a saw saws a hole underneath Stu & Didi, then, they fall through. They are picked up by a giant stork by its claws, holding him inside its beak, while flying with a flock of storks. Cut to a puppet theater, with puppeteer Lipschitz holding Stu and Didi puppets. Tommy and Dil snatch the puppets from him, and fight over them] Don't forget the older when attending to the younger, / Sibling rivalry can damage all of you. [the Pickles' house plops on top of them. As its walls bulge, Stu & Didi rush out with Dil, dodging falling giant baby items - rattle, baby bottle, safety pin] Be a mother, don't smother, / Why do you want a neurosis? [Dil grows unbelievably large, crushing Stu & Didi] Failure to oralise can lead to toilet training disturbances. [Dil's diaper bulges, then explodes. Cut to Stu, changing Dil's diaper. He pops out of a diaper pail, yelling] Wrong! [cut to Didi, rocking Tommy & Dil to sleep. They start to cry when he rolls up a window and shouts] Wrong![cut to Stu, strolling Dil with Tommy on his back. He looks with a magnifying glass, as Drew, Betty and Charlotte look on] Careful, now! [cut to Dil crying, in an auto carrier. Stu and Didi rush to his aid, when he, with Chaz, Lou and Howard looking on, opens the roof and says] No, no, no! Bad parents! Bad parents! [cut to Stu, Didi and Dil rushing through the city. The winged babies picked them up and flew them to a temple of justice. He appears as a "lawyer"] Raising a baby is a complicated venture. / Not to be embarked on by a weaker constitution. [then appears as a giant baby, standing on the table, between Dil and Tommy] It's really something different, from what we fantacise, / You are doing something wrong when the baby cries. [leaps to the couple. Then, he goes to a jury of Dils, which gives "thumbs down". The couple magically appears in prison garb, and a ball and chain] It's really very different, from what we fantacise, / You are doing something wrong when the baby...starts to...cry!

[Tommy plops a giant book on top of the couple. The dream ends, waking up the couple. They look at each other as Dil cries]