Mary Shelley's Frankenhole2010

[after Victor and Elizabeth's 1,000th Anniversary]

Polidori:
How did it go?

Victor Frankenstein:
It was a bloodbath.

Polidori:
So it was good?

Victor Frankenstein:
No. She left me.

Polidori:
So it was bad?

Victor Frankenstein:
No. It was neither good nor bad. I feel nothing.

Polidori:
Well, I'm sure the fat chinese hippie didn't help.

Victor Frankenstein:
Japanese!

Polidori:
[curious] Really?

Victor Frankenstein:
I'm confused, Polidori. I used to love Elizabeth.

Polidori:
The Elizabeth that was completely indifferent to you.

Victor Frankenstein:
Yeah -- Her. Oh, god, she was so beautiful way back then. And uncaring and cold and so va-va-va in love with other men! Ah, but that was all before I ruined everything!

Polidori:
That Elizabeth is still there in the past, you know.

Victor Frankenstein:
[scoffs] I couldn't. That would be...beneath me.

Polidori:
Do you think?

Victor Frankenstein:
Alright. Look, I've been an arrogant, good-looking, genius bastard. I admit it.

Polidori:
Don't be so hard on yourself.

Victor Frankenstein:
But one thing I'm not, is a cheat! Cheating implies weakness!