Mary Shelley's Frankenhole2010

[after Victor wins the race]

Victor Frankenstein:
Thank you! Oh! And look who is too sheepish to congratulate me!

[Victor sees Count Dracula carrying Dom Deluise while running]

Victor Frankenstein:
Fleeing from me in shame! [laughs]

Larry Bird:
He's not fleeing from you in shame, Victor. He's running in the Foot Race.

Victor Frankenstein:
Foot..race? FOOT RACE!

[seconds later, Victor wons the foot race]

Victor Frankenstein:
Well, Howard, it was a tough race, but --

Former Howard Cosell:
You're supposed to be eating, you fool!

Victor Frankenstein:
Ha ha, yes. Well, it's a beautiful victory feast, but after all those hot dogs --

Larry Bird:
But this is the final leg of the rally -- The Eating Contest.

Victor Frankenstein:
Eating contest? [sadly tearing up] Oh, my god.